What Is God Doing?

This is an interesting stage of life. Baby...work...home...church...friends. Life is so much different and faster with a baby. The schedule has picked up as I really, really want to spend lots of time outside this summer. 

I think being stuck in the house in the middle of the country with a baby all winter got to me. By the end of winter, I was at the end of my wits. This summer is such a godsend. I know it has only just arrived, but I have been waiting for it longingly. I want to be gone on weekends, to use the RV (finally after 5 years of paying on it every month and never doing anything with it), to play with Isabella in the water, to water my garden and watch it grow (the weeding I can do without). Then there are the regular things of summer, like mowing the lawn, house projects which multiply like little the gnats around here, lots of dirty laundry, and so on and so on.

With all that...stuff, it takes a lot more effort to remember to slow down and see what God is doing. Things are happening at our church, and I am trying to figure out where I fit in all of it. I have struggled for two years with wanting to jump in, to do a bunch of stuff, and with knowing that my new life as a work-at-home mom needs to be figured out first. It can be hard work to slow down enough to hear God. What is He doing? Where does He want me to be? Is there something else He has for me, or is He asking me to jump in and go for it?

I don't know. I do know that I love the sense of anticipation in my heart. Wherever He leads, I know He will prepare me for it. His plans are amazing. I love looking forward to what He will do. 

And this picture is just because I like a blog post that has a picture. And because cute summer babies playing outside are irresistible. Especially mine. :-)

It's here!

I haven't mentioned anything about this because I wanted to wait to see it in person. And now I can post about it! Isabella and I are on the cover of a magazine! You won't find it on any newsstands, but it's pretty cool to me.

I was not planning on writing an article for this issue, but I had offered some information and expressed an interest in the topic. The editor emailed me a few weeks later and said that she was short on articles and could use another one if I would be willing to write. The timing was poor and I was not sure how to approach the topic, but I really wanted to do it. Because of the timing, I only ended up with one evening in which to write it. I sat down with no clear direction and started writing. By the end, I really felt that God had worked through me to write His message.

When I emailed the article, I also sent a couple of pictures of me and Isabella for the bio. I was really happy with the article and excited about the opportunity to write. The following week, the editor emailed me back. She asked if they could use one of the pictures of us for the cover! I was very surprised, and I made sure to ask Heth first since she took the picture. Everything fell into place, and I have been pretty excited for the day it would finally come in the mail.

And today was the day!

The article hasn't been posted online yet, but I retained the rights to it, so I will probably repost it here pretty soon.

P.S. Some days that have something really awesome in them also have something really crappy. I'm not sure why that is. It's putting a damper on my evening, and I'm not doing a very good job of focusing on the positive.

Dreaming

Matt and I saw "Inception" last week. We don't watch TV, so I had only heard of the movie through Facebook posts. I looked it up at Plugged In and we both thought it would be worth seeing.

I don't like giving away the plot of a movie, but I have to explain a little of it in order to expand on my thoughts. In the movie, dreams can be manipulated and people can enter into the dreams of others. It's quite fascinating, and it held my interest very well. (I get bored with movies pretty easily.)

I am ever the realist, so during the movie I reflected on my own belief that one person cannot enter the dreams of another. It makes for an interesting movie plot, but I cannot reconcile it with reality. I don't put much thought into what happens in my dreams. Unless it is an incredibly vivid dream, I leave it behind once the voice an infant rouses me from that dream world. I rarely have time to revisit it in the course of my day.

I have other dreams; dreams that are not simply confined to my sleeping hours. Dreams that are held deep within my heart. I have shared some dreams with those closest to me. Sometimes we share the same dreams, the same hopes for a shared future. I am not sure if those dreams will ever become reality. Sometimes I wonder if God gives us dreams so that we keep hoping for the future. I believe, however, that some dreams are planted deep within us so we will hang on tightly and not let them go no matter how much life tries to wrangle them from our grasp.

I hang on to my dreams. I will keep hoping that one day God will bring them to pass in amazing, mind-blowing ways.

Missing You

When you live far from those you call family - parents, siblings, and extended family - you have to create your own family. Your friends become like family. Those you work with, minister with, and share life with are the family God has provided. I am grateful for each one I have come to know and love.

However, if you are a sister, you also know that there is no bond like a sister bond. We are linked forever by our blood and our heritage, our memories and our faces, our laughs and our shared experiences.

I have two sisters. They live 8 hours from me. One is pregnant, due near the end of October. I feel far removed from this incredible event in her life. I haven't seen her since the end of March, and I don't know when I will be able to meet her beautiful baby because of the distance between us. I talk to my sisters on the phone, but we don't get to "share life" as fully as when we lived in the same town. They still live in the same town, and sometimes I get jealous of the times they share. I am the oldest and not used to being the one left out of things.

Ministry is a different calling; if I had a choice, I would live much closer to them. But unless God allows it, I will make the best of what we have, the times we do share, and the friendship that was birthed decades ago in our cozy, childhood home.

(With Mom and Grandma)