Under the Bell Tower

Maggie May

2012-01-14T23:23:00.000-06:00

Mandee, me, and Maggie in January 2005

My dear friend Maggie went to be with Jesus last weekend. Today was her memorial service in San Jose, CA. I wanted to be there so badly. It really broke my heart to be sitting here when all I wanted to do was join with those who were celebrating her amazing life. I wanted to make my contribution, to share my memories of Maggie and bring glory to the God who gave her to us. Here are some of the joys from my friendship with Maggie May.

In 2004, Maggie moved to Waverly, IA, to intern at Open Bible Church. I was the children's pastor, she was a licensed minister as well and looking to get some experience and possibly find a ministry position in the Central Region. I remember meeting her in Jim and Sharon's backyard. I don't remember much else about her coming. It just seems like we were friends from the start. Maggie loved to put puzzles together, and so did I, so my puzzle collection grew exponentially while Maggie was here. We could do a 1,000 piece puzzle in one evening! She was awesome; I have issues concentrating, but she just kicked it.

We went to the Fall Minister's Retreat together and shared a room that year. I just remember that the theme was something about marriage, and I'm pretty sure Maggie and I were the only single ministers there. :) We bonded a lot that week! I remember some serious hip-hop action on the road trip. I'm pretty sure it was in Branson that year, so we had to have met up with my sisters. I wish I could remember more about that.

The picture below was at the 2004 Harvest Party. People still remember her costume. I'm so glad I have pictures of it!!

This is a silly thing, but I remember Bath and Body Works released a new fragrance that year, Black Raspberry Vanilla. We both loved it. Every time I smell it, I think of her.

Maggie helped me with a Kid's Night Out pajama party. This is a picture of us that night. She was so much fun!

I remember sitting in my living room eating Rolos and assembling a puzzle while we watched the 2004 presidential election results.

I got Maggie on the Weight Watchers train with me, so we counted points together. It have always enjoyed introducing people to Weight Watchers because it's so easy to follow, and it was great to see her excitement at losing a few pants sizes that year. I remember once we rode bikes from the Long's house to East Bremer Diner and back. I figured if we rode the whole way, we could eat yummy broasted chicken and burn it back off. :)

Maggie sang "Breath of Heaven" at Christmas time, and I did a human video with it. That was a great experience. Everyone who heard her sing said she had the voice of an angel, and she really, really did. She and Bill sang together a couple of times, and I wish I had a copy of one of them. I would love to hear it again and again.

It was really hard on Maggie that she couldn't afford to go home for Christmas that year. She stayed here with the Long family, and they bought her a djembe for Christmas. It was a great gift for her, and she loved it. She loved them so much. She couldn't have asked for a better family to treat her as their own during her time in Waverly.

I remember playing Donkey Konga with Maggie over at the Long's. Man, she was so stinking good at that game! She had serious skills...she killed everyone. I loved watching her play it (not necessarily playing against her, though!!).

My birthday was in January, and we went out with friends that evening. Here's a picture of Natalie, Mandee, me, Maggie, and Jen. It was such a fun night. Maggie had the most beautiful smile and the best laugh. I can still hear it.

A couple in our church own a bed and breakfast, and they gave me a free night to stay there for Pastor's Appreciation. I took Maggie with me, and I remember doing puzzles (of course) and watching movies all night long. We had a great time, and Maggie is the only person beside Matt with whom I have stayed at a B&B! :-)

They also have a working farm, so we got a tour the next day. Here is a picture of us with the brand new baby calves in the background.

Maggie struggled with loneliness and missing her family for much of her time in Waverly. She had never been this far away from home, certainly not for such a long period of time, and it was really hard on her for a lot of reasons. She eventually left in February to move back home. She had also started talking to Morgan on the phone, and they ended up getting engaged in May (I believe) and married in August, so I think it all worked out the way it should have. Before she left, Maggie and I went out with Bill and Natalie one night. Here's a picture of me, Maggie, and Bill at Jag's Java.

I was pretty sad when Maggie left. I had very few (if any) single friends in Waverly, and it was really great to have someone to spend time with. It was only a few months after she left that Matt and I started hanging out, but I was glad he had known her (he took over her guitar class when she left in February).

Maggie and I kept up on the phone pretty often, especially at first. She asked me to be in her wedding in August, but I wasn't able to do it. We always commented on the fact that she lived here for only about 6 months, but God knit our hearts together in that time. We shared a closeness that defied the short span of our time together. We could catch up on the phone as if no time had passed.

I remember when she called to tell me she had breast cancer. I remember that Matt and I went to San Jose for vacation in 2007, and it was only months later that she and Morgan moved to San Jose to take a youth pastor position. I was SO bummed that we had not been able to see her when we were so close.

I never did see Maggie after she moved from Waverly. I can't even remember for sure our last phone conversation. I had left her messages for a few months, but we never caught up on the phone in recent months. I had been telling Matt for a few months that I really wanted to go visit her. I looked up tickets, thought about bringing Bella, and tried to decide if waiting until January would be okay since our fall was so busy. I had a feeling it would not work out for some reason. I knew if I didn't go in the fall, I would probably not get to see her.

I wanted to see her again. I wanted to tell Maggie how important she was to me, how glad I am that God allowed our paths to cross here in Waverly, Iowa. Maggie was a bright shining light in my life. Even though this was a hard season for her, I just remember her with a huge smile on her face. I remember her laugh and the joy she exuded. I will never forget how, every time I talked to her on the phone, she always wanted to know about me and didn't want to complain about her cancer or the treatment or the pain she was in.

Maggie inspired me with her life, with her joy and her complete devotion to God. I always figured God would heal Maggie and use her to be an amazing testimony of His grace and goodness. She is that testimony, but not in the way I imagined. I could hardly look at my baby girl this week without wanting to cry, thinking about how much God has blessed me to be a mom and get to raise her when Maggie wanted that so badly for so many years. God's grace has given me this gift and so many others. I know the challenge is to keep from taking them all for granted, especially as time passes and Maggie isn't the first thing on my mind when I wake up in the morning.

I am determined to use the years I have left on this earth to be the shining light that Maggie was to me and countless others. I am determined that light will not fade just because Maggie is not here with us. I know it still shines in me, and I think it shines brighter because I am carrying on the light she left here. She doesn't need it anymore, after all. She has all the Light she will ever need.

I love you, Maggie. I will never forget you or your joy or your laugh. I will always be grateful for our friendship. I will cherish the memories I have. I will look forward to the day when I see you again. Save some puzzles for me!

What Is God Doing?

2011-06-07T20:37:00.001-05:00

This is an interesting stage of life. Baby...work...home...church...friends. Life is so much different and faster with a baby. The schedule has picked up as I really, really want to spend lots of time outside this summer.

I think being stuck in the house in the middle of the country with a baby all winter got to me. By the end of winter, I was at the end of my wits. This summer is such a godsend. I know it has only just arrived, but I have been waiting for it longingly. I want to be gone on weekends, to use the RV (finally after 5 years of paying on it every month and never doing anything with it), to play with Isabella in the water, to water my garden and watch it grow (the weeding I can do without). Then there are the regular things of summer, like mowing the lawn, house projects which multiply like little the gnats around here, lots of dirty laundry, and so on and so on.

With all that...stuff, it takes a lot more effort to remember to slow down and see what God is doing. Things are happening at our church, and I am trying to figure out where I fit in all of it. I have struggled for two years with wanting to jump in, to do a bunch of stuff, and with knowing that my new life as a work-at-home mom needs to be figured out first. It can be hard work to slow down enough to hear God. What is He doing? Where does He want me to be? Is there something else He has for me, or is He asking me to jump in and go for it?

I don't know. I do know that I love the sense of anticipation in my heart. Wherever He leads, I know He will prepare me for it. His plans are amazing. I love looking forward to what He will do.

And this picture is just because I like a blog post that has a picture. And because cute summer babies playing outside are irresistible. Especially mine. :-)

5x7 Folded Card

2011-06-07T20:05:00.001-05:00

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Yep, it's really me.

2011-04-15T14:11:00.000-05:00

Holy cow...where have I been?!?

I've been here, living life, watching my baby turn into a toddler and turn ONE year old last month. I assumed everyone I know has a Facebook, so I post updates and pictures there. But yesterday Kathy told me that she missed my blog, and I thought I would post a few of my favorite Isabella pictures from the last few months just for her! :-) Maybe someday she'll get a Facebook. Maybe someday I'll get back to blogging regularly. I hope so. I just can't commit to it right now. I have been doing a lot of fun stuff, though - I started Weight Watchers again and have lost almost 10 pounds (yeah!); I've been crafting when I can squeeze it in (not very often, but it's still lots of fun); we took our first overnight trip away from Isabella (it was great!); I have volunteered for a few things at church that are only once a month, but I love it so far!

The list could go on, but I'm going to get these pictures posted. Enjoy, Kathy! :-)

Isabella was a big helper when Mommy went into fill in at work!

Showing off her teeth (which have since multiplied)!

Getting ready for summer!

Playing with Grampy!

Isabella likes watching train DVDs with Daddy (I am not sure why).

Isabella and Daddy!

From her one year photo shoot. I love this "cuddle shot" as my mom called it.

My big-eyed beauty.

A semi-ornery smile.

I LOVE this one!

Power to the Legos! (credit goes to Zack for that one)

Me and my girl.

Happy one year, Isabella!!

On Loan from God

2010-09-29T21:38:00.000-05:00

Isabella was dedicated on Saturday! It was such a great day. She even had her first crib nap in months! (I've really been hoping to start her naps in the crib soon, but I had no choice on Saturday, and it worked great!)

We had so many special people here with us; both sets of grandparents, both my sisters and one brother-in-law, both of Isabella's cousins, Matt's sister, brother, and sister-in-law, and Matt's grandma, aunt, and uncle.

The dedication is on Saturday afternoon in the church chapel. It opened with a beautiful song (I just looked it up - Find Your Wings by Mark Harris). Pastor John then shared an explanation of the promises the parents had agreed to make in this dedication of our child. The promises were included in the program as well.

He emphasized that our children are on loan from God. I have thought about this a lot in Isabella's 6 months of life. My personality lends itself to being obsessive, and I am obsessive about things that seem to be wrong. I always want to fix it - if she's not sleeping well, I want to fix it. If she didn't gain much weight, I want to fix it. If she doesn't want anyone else to hold her, I want to fix it. When I come to the end of my rope and realize that everything can't be "fixed," I am so comforted in knowing that she belongs to God. She always has; she is on loan to us for a time, but she will always be His child. I am getting better at remembering this fact before I do my crazy thing.

After the message, each family was called up to be introduced and prayed over. We chose a verse for Isabella, and I spoke it over her. It was Psalm 73:23-24:

Yet I am always with you. You hold me by my right hand, you guide me with your counsel, and afterward, you will take me into glory."

Matt was asked how Isabella has changed our lives, and he talked about how having a baby helps up realize how selfish we are. It has also shown us a love unlike anything we have ever known. Then Pastor John prayed for our family. They presented us with a few gifts; a Bible, a teddy bear, a bib, and a tag blanket (looks like this). There was a red ribbon on the table, and everyone who came to the dedication wrote a special note to Isabella on the ribbon. The blanket has a Velcro section that can be opened, and the ribbons goes inside. Isabella will be able to carry this reminder of the love that surrounds her wherever she goes.

Following the dedication, they provided pizza for the family in the church cafe. We were introduced at the 5:30 p.m. service that day as well.

I have seen and been a part of many baby and child dedications, but what they do at Prairie Lakes Church is amazing and so special. I am thrilled that we had Isabella dedicated here. I will never forget this special day.

You Are So Beautiful to Me

2010-09-24T12:26:00.000-05:00

I promised to post the article that I wrote about here. I'm finally getting around to it! This article was originally printed in The Message of the Open Bible September/October 2010 issue.

My daughter is beautiful. She is only 4 months old, but she is already so beautiful to me. I don’t know what others see when they look at her because I can only see her through my eyes. My view of her may be biased, but it is the only view I have.

The same is true for my view of myself; I can only see through my own eyes. Many women struggle to see themselves as beautiful because of the world’s increasing focus on physical beauty and sexuality. Beauty is subjective, but this culture has determined that beauty has a very narrow definition. Our television shows include makeovers that turn a woman from an “ugly duckling” to a “beautiful swan.” I believe it is a warped mentality that places a woman’s physical beauty far above her mental capabilities, social skills, and character qualities in determining her worth. Our culture’s obsession with a woman’s body has greatly impacted her ability to see the beauty God created in every facet of who she is. Our culture’s focus on women’s bodies has also affected a man’s ability to see a woman as God created her and not as the sum total of her body parts.

I believe that the lack of self-worth many women experience is compounded by the increased sexuality in media and our culture today. I can’t buy a gallon of milk without seeing a magazine cover with a provocatively dressed woman or a woman (or young girl) in the store dressed in the least amount of clothing possible. Many girls and women dress as provocatively as possible for the attention they receive from men. However, that attention is often fleeting and leaves them dealing with the pain of rejection until they can attract the next man to make them feel beautiful again.

What is a woman to do when faced with so much “propaganda” telling her what she should look like and what it means to be beautiful? Philippians 4:8 has a suggestion for us: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” (ESV) I cannot change the fact that my eyes will come into contact with many images in a day. Some of the things I see threaten to remind me that I am not “good enough” to make a magazine cover. If I choose to let my thoughts stay there, it doesn’t take long for hopelessness and depression to find their way in as well. So I remind myself of Philippians 4:8 many times in a day. I can choose to focus on many things, and the time I spend focusing on what I am not is time that I can’t spend thinking about my family, my future, and the amazing blessings God has given me.

I can recount many statistics that illustrate how depraved our society has become. However, I would rather not place my focus on that today. These verses get to the root of the issue for me: “For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.” (Romans 8:5-6, ESV) When women (and men) set their minds on the things of the flesh, the end result is death. Many spiritually and emotionally dead people have lost sight of the importance of where they set their minds.

My daughter is growing up in this over-sexualized, over-stimulated world. This is the world into which she was born. I will do my best to tell her every day that she is beautiful. She is beautiful to me. She is beautiful to God. I don’t want her to ever forget it.

Side note: I highly recommend Matt Chandler’s podcast “The Greatest Commandment Part 13: Canvas” for an excellent perspective on the life of the mind. It can be found in a PDF version at http://fm.thevillagechurch.net/resource_files/transcripts/200502139999HWC21ASAAA_MattChandler_TheGreatestCommandmentPt13-Canvas.pdf or the audio version at http://fm.thevillagechurch.net/resource_files/audio/200502139999HWC21ASAAA_MattChandler_TheGreatestCommandmentPt13-Canvas.mp3.

Six Month Surprise

2010-09-19T22:04:00.000-05:00

We took Isabella to her six month appointment on Friday. She is such a little peanut, so I was pretty curious to find out what she would weigh for this check up. She weighed in at 10 pounds, 15 ounces. For some reason, I had it in my head that she was 9 pounds, 4 ounces at the last appointment, but apparently that was the appointment prior to the last one. She weighed 11 pounds and a few ounces at the 4 month appointment, so she lost a few ounces. I was very surprised, but the doctor was not worried about it. She grew an inch in length and gained an inch in head circumference and is meeting all her milestones. By all those standards and by all appearances, she's a healthy little girl. She is as strong as can be; I can't believe how hard she can grab the toys on her Exersaucer, and she pulls my hair very well.

We scheduled a weight check in a month. She has yet to hit her 6-month growth spurt, so I imagine that will come sometime in the next few weeks. She has also been very distracted during nursing over the past few weeks (or more). Especially if I'm trying to do anything else at the same time; she is much more interested in what I'm doing than in eating. So I started taking her into her room and keeping distractions to a minimum.

So that's it.

Yeah, right.

As I thought about it after leaving the doctor's office and running some errands with her, it really upset me. I felt like a bad mother.

How could I not know that she didn't gain any weight?

Is it my fault? Is it because I started Weight Watchers?

Is there something wrong with my breastmilk?

And the eternal question...why would God put me through this? She's been doing fine, she seems just fine, and now all of a sudden I'm insanely worried about her and feeling like a terrible, horrible, unfit mother.

I really, really didn't want to tell anyone. I figured I could ignore it, but I knew that those who know me and know we went to the doctor would ask. So I decided to be tough and act like it's all fine.

Then I saw Melanie. And I knew she would understand. She would not judge me or think less of me.

So I cried.

Then I felt better.

What I now realize is this: God loves Isabella. He loves her more than I do, and He gave her to me and Matt to raise and nurture. I have done my best with her, and she has done great for her first six months. She has always been small, and she will grow at her own pace. All I can do is to take care of her the best I know how and trust God to do the rest.

She belongs to Him, after all.

I knew this all along. I just let the worries and disappointment push it out of my mind this weekend. But I'm better today. And as long as I keep that in mind, we will all be just fine.

Joyful in Hope

2010-09-14T22:01:00.000-05:00

Isabella is being dedicated at our church in just a couple of weeks. I am excited at the thought and effort they put into child dedication. They sent us a packet of information when we signed up, and one of the pages included verse ideas for Parent/Child Dedication. (It's actually a Child Dedication/Parent Commitment Service.) They ask parents to choose a "promise verse" that will be prayed over the child at the service.

Last night, I was reading through the verse ideas to see if anything struck a chord with me. They list a passage from Romans 12, which is to me one of the most practical chapters in the Bible. I have always been drawn to it. The passage listed includes verse 12, "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." (NIV)

Joyful in hope. Joyful in hope. I listen to a lot of Matt Chandler sermons, so I can't remember exactly where I heard this one. I think it was somewhere in the Luke series. He said that hope can only be present where something is lacking. If there is hope, that also means there is hurt, pain, something missing. That is obviously an overriding theme for the follower of Jesus - we are always longing for the day we will see Him. The pain of this world is a reminder that we are not home yet.

In many smaller ways, I hold onto hope every single day. I hope that God will bring healing where I have wounded. I hope for freedom and perseverance for those I love who are stuck in difficult situations. I hope to see God do amazing things in me, in my family, in my friends. Unfortunately, I can't always use the word joyful to describe my hope. How about...

...frustrated?

...anxious?

...impatient?

That is not an impressive list of adjectives. I really need God to bring joy to my hope. I may have to wait a long time to see these hopes and many others be realized.

God isn't as concerned with the "resolution" to my trials as He is with who I am becoming in the midst of them.

It's here!

2010-09-13T19:49:00.000-05:00

I haven't mentioned anything about this because I wanted to wait to see it in person. And now I can post about it! Isabella and I are on the cover of a magazine! You won't find it on any newsstands, but it's pretty cool to me.

I was not planning on writing an article for this issue, but I had offered some information and expressed an interest in the topic. The editor emailed me a few weeks later and said that she was short on articles and could use another one if I would be willing to write. The timing was poor and I was not sure how to approach the topic, but I really wanted to do it. Because of the timing, I only ended up with one evening in which to write it. I sat down with no clear direction and started writing. By the end, I really felt that God had worked through me to write His message.

When I emailed the article, I also sent a couple of pictures of me and Isabella for the bio. I was really happy with the article and excited about the opportunity to write. The following week, the editor emailed me back. She asked if they could use one of the pictures of us for the cover! I was very surprised, and I made sure to ask Heth first since she took the picture. Everything fell into place, and I have been pretty excited for the day it would finally come in the mail.

And today was the day!

The article hasn't been posted online yet, but I retained the rights to it, so I will probably repost it here pretty soon.

P.S. Some days that have something really awesome in them also have something really crappy. I'm not sure why that is. It's putting a damper on my evening, and I'm not doing a very good job of focusing on the positive.

Vacation!

2010-08-30T20:14:00.000-05:00

Our first "real" date was a trip to the House on the Rock in Wisconsin and dinner in Galena. We both love to travel, and we started out spending a LOT of time in the car for a new couple. I am so glad that we share this passion. We have enjoyed some incredible trips in our 5 years together. One of our favorites was a trip to California in 2007. All I have to say is, "Remember when we went to California?" And we both instantly sigh with great joy as we remember all the fun we shared on that trip.

I know my husands love of trains is pretty unique (especially for someone his age), but even I admit that we found some awesome spots for train watching ( called "railfanninng" if you're serious about it).

We also spent time in San Francisco and visited the Ghirardelli Factory. Yeah. Enough said.

The "railfanning" portion of our trip...oh, who am I kidding - it was all about trains in California. My husband plans to model the Donner Mountains in his model railroad someday, and it was really exciting to be with him the first time he visited Donner Pass.

The scenery was incredible. I did not realize that I have a pretty strong fear of heights, and I vividly remember crying on the way up the mountain. I wanted to be with him for this experience, but I was quite certain we would not live to see another day as we climbed higher and higher (in the car; we didn't really climb it, thank God). But I survived, he survived, and we have some very cool memories as a result of it.

I could go on about our California trip for hours. I could also reminisce about our trip to Chicago just days before I found out I was pregnant...no wonder I was so tired!

We have been to Boston, Minneapolis, Springfield, St. Louis, Kansas City, and of course, Cancun! I love vacation with my husband. We have always talked about vacationing with our children as Matt has great memories of traveling with his family growing up. We have already taken a few short trips with Isabella. At her age, it is a combination of fun and stress with new surroundings and our uncertainty at how she will respond. But no matter what, it's an adventure. And we are in it together, my husband and me.

Happy 5 months!

2010-08-14T20:40:00.000-05:00

I've done this for the past few months, and it's a good opportunity for me to chronicle the milestones Isabella has reached and who she is at 5 months. Because, let's face it, the baby book hasn't been touched since I started back to work, and I don't see it happening any time soon. But this works! So...here is the story of Isabella's life these days:

1. She rolls over so quickly! And she pushes up on her arms and lifts herself so high; it's so cute. She never liked tummy time, so I love seeing her have a little time on her tummy. And it is true; even without tummy time, she rolled over and has a very strong neck and head. So there! :-)

2. She is getting so much better at holding on to her toys and munching on them. This is her favorite toy right now:

She loves this little guy! I think she can grab and hang on to him easily, and he's soft to chew on. Last week on the way to church, we handed her this toy in the car seat. It was time for her nap, but she ended up playing with him the whole time and didn't go to sleep. Now if it's nap time during the car ride, I make sure he's not around.

3. She is still in her 0-3 month clothes for the most part. I've begun to work in the 3-6 month stuff. She has a lot of summer stuff that won't get worn if I don't! Actually, the onesie in the picture above is a newborn. The Target brand Circo seems to run huge! I can't believe a 5 month old can still wear a newborn size. I was so excited for some of the 6 month stuff to fit this week; she wore some outfits for the first time, including one of my absolute favorites:

I just love her in red. (I love red period, but my baby girl in red...I am all about it.) Honestly, it's nice that she fits in her clothes longer, but I'm getting sick of the 3 month stuff. I'm ready for something new! :-) Shocking, I know.

4. This week she started giggling more. I got laughs out of her 4 days in a row! I've been waiting for the laughing to really start. It is so incredible. I'll do anything to get that baby giggle! It's just priceless.

5. She is such a good sleeper. She's been sleeping through the night for quite a while with minimal night wakings (once or twice a week). She also goes to bed pretty early. Well, early for an adult, but little baby girl needs her rest! She's in bed between 5 and 6 p.m., depending on the ending time of her last nap. It's so awesome because I can wait and make dinner after she's in bed. I can also make evening plans without worrying that she will wake up or need to eat. I always have milk in the fridge just in case, but it hasn't happened yet. The only downside is that Matt and I can't go out together unless we ask someone to come here and "watch" her, which would be a very easy job, but we haven't done it yet. I'm sure we will, though. It does make it hard on the nights when Matt doesn't get home until after she's in bed, but he sees her most days at lunch as well. The funny thing is that I'm always relieved when she goes to bed and I can get a few things done, but after a few hours, I can't wait for her to wake up so I can hold her again. I peek in on her just to see her cuteness and the funny positions she works herself into, but I refuse to take pictures. It's not worth waking her up. :-)

6. We will take our biggest vacation so far in just a couple of weeks. It's been over a month since we went out of town or stayed anywhere else overnight. We will see how she does! Especially since we have been sleep training since that time. I haven't decided if I'll keep her out later than usual or if I will try to get her in bed early if possible. Either way, we'll get her back on her schedule when we get home.

7. We bought an Exersaucer this month. She loves it! She is so adorable in it. I stuff a blanket around her as she's still a little wobbly, but she yanks on those toys so hard - it amazes me!

8. I wanted to mention solid foods. I really (really, really) want to wait until (at least) 6 months before starting solids. I'm just not sure if I'll be able to put her off for another month. She is showing so much interest in our food and drink. I know she's interested in pretty much everything we have, so I can't tell if she is really ready for solids or not. Even if we do start a little solid food here and there, breast milk is still supposed to provide the bulk of her nutrition until a year of age, so I will definitely stick to that recommendation. But I am looking forward to seeing her try new foods (sort of) and to making some baby food for her. Either way, I will most likely skip the cereal and go straight to vegetables and fruits. I've done a lot of reading, and I like that plan best. Fun stuff!

This is certainly going by quickly. I enjoy being her mom so much. It is really challenging at times, but she is so wonderful. And there is so much still to come!

Pinching Pennies and Such

2010-08-10T22:25:00.000-05:00

I've always been obsessed with shopping sales and clearance, but I have recently discovered a few websites that have helped me in my quest to get the best possible price. I have been regularly frequenting a few new sites - Penny Pinchin Mom and Mrs. Moneysaver are two of my favorites. They often have the same deals listed, but occasionally I find something different. I don't get the Sunday newspaper, so I haven't been a practicing coupon clipper for a while. I did collect coupons whenever possible, but these sites have recently encouraged me to start printing coupons. I have been to the grocery store several times in the last month or two where my coupons have totaled $10+ (including store coupons).

I never realized that you can often combine a store coupon (like a coupon from the Hy-Vee ad) with a manufacturer's coupon. Last week, I found an amazing deal. I don't want to bore you with the details, but I ended up with a box of 96 diapers, 2 small baby food jars, 320 baby wipes, 4 pounds of boneless, skinless chicken breasts, 2 boxes of Wheat Thins, a bottle of barbecue sauce, 2 air fresheners, and a 3-pack of Kleenex boxes for $25 total. I was SO excited! I would have gone back and done the whole thing twice, but the truth is that I have found so many incredible diaper deals lately that I have over 400 size 2 diapers and over 500 size 3 diapers. I also have...well, a LOT of baby wipes. So I decided not to totally freak my husband out and just got the deal once.

It's been lots of fun trying to see how many coupons I can get. Some of the other deals I love are photo gifts and prints. Shutterfly has this deal for 3 personalized photo 5x7 greeting cards for $1 shipped. Okay, it was $1.01. You can choose from a bunch of different designs - the wedding designs are gorgeous! I've opened two new accounts just so I could do this a few extra times. I may do another one or two before it ends on September 1. I know plenty of grandmas and grandpas who would love a thank you card with a picture of the grandbaby on the front! :-)

Early "Training"

2010-08-04T09:04:00.000-05:00

She is truly Daddy's girl.

Milestones

2010-08-03T22:07:00.000-05:00

I am amazed at how many milestone there are in a baby's life! In 4 and a half months, we've had the first smile, recognizing Mom and Dad, the first laugh, rolling over, head control, grabbing, holding a toy...they just keep coming. I have anticipated each milestone with great excitement.

The early days of newborn-ness were hard. I looked forward to getting some response, some feedback from the baby I was working so hard to care for every day. As each milestone has arrived, I have enjoyed seeing her change and grow. I have also found myself sadly realizing that she will never again be a brand new baby who can do nothing for herself. She's not changing her own diaper or anything. But with every milestone, she is a different baby and will never be the same again. I'm torn with each new stage between being excited to see her growth and being sad that the previous stage has ended so suddenly.

Now that you know I am ridiculously sentimental...I still do look forward to what's coming next. I plan to wait until she is 6 months old to start her on solids, but I am definitely excited about (parts of) it. I can't wait to see her face when she tastes food for the first time. I look forward to her reactions to the different flavors. I definitely don't look forward to cleaning up after her, but that's all a part of it, I guess.

Almost every day I try to take a few moments and just enjoy who she is right now. She gives me the best smiles right after she has finished eating. I love those big smiles. She is very active; she has completed some barrel rolls that surprise me. On the days when I wish she could just TELL me what to do to make her happy, I remind myself that, one of these days, I will wish she could just STOP TELLING ME what to do to make her happy.

One of these days.

Dreaming

2010-07-18T21:17:00.004-05:00

Matt and I saw "Inception" last week. We don't watch TV, so I had only heard of the movie through Facebook posts. I looked it up at Plugged In and we both thought it would be worth seeing.

I don't like giving away the plot of a movie, but I have to explain a little of it in order to expand on my thoughts. In the movie, dreams can be manipulated and people can enter into the dreams of others. It's quite fascinating, and it held my interest very well. (I get bored with movies pretty easily.)

I am ever the realist, so during the movie I reflected on my own belief that one person cannot enter the dreams of another. It makes for an interesting movie plot, but I cannot reconcile it with reality. I don't put much thought into what happens in my dreams. Unless it is an incredibly vivid dream, I leave it behind once the voice an infant rouses me from that dream world. I rarely have time to revisit it in the course of my day.

I have other dreams; dreams that are not simply confined to my sleeping hours. Dreams that are held deep within my heart. I have shared some dreams with those closest to me. Sometimes we share the same dreams, the same hopes for a shared future. I am not sure if those dreams will ever become reality. Sometimes I wonder if God gives us dreams so that we keep hoping for the future. I believe, however, that some dreams are planted deep within us so we will hang on tightly and not let them go no matter how much life tries to wrangle them from our grasp.

I hang on to my dreams. I will keep hoping that one day God will bring them to pass in amazing, mind-blowing ways.

You've heard it all before...

2010-07-18T20:50:00.003-05:00

So I'm obsessed with Target. It's old news. Today's deals were again all 75% off.

Again...I cannot resist posting a picture of them. The plastic cups/bowls were all 50 cents for 4. I bought a bunch so we can have some extras for the RV (whenever it is completed). The pool was $3. The toys were all 75 cents. The super cute round tray with handles was $3.74.

And the big red tub. Ah, I'm in love with the big red tub.

I have wanted this tub to come home with me since the first time I laid eyes on it. It's so...big. I can picture it full of ice and icy cold beverages. I couldn't really justify the $20 price tag, so I wandered past it on occasion and hoped it might still be around when the price was, well, lower.

And today was that magical day. At a price of $4.99, I am the happy new owner of a huge red metal tub.

I'm also excited about the toys and the pool that will be stashed away for use next summer by what will then be my...toddler! (Yikes.)

P.S. Everything in the picture (tub included) totaled right around $25. For a little more than the original cost of the tub, I brought home the tub full of fun stuff!

Happy 4 months!

2010-07-15T21:36:00.003-05:00

Isabella is 4 months old! It is certainly going by quickly. Her appointment is tomorrow. Matt will be coming along so I can step into the hall for the next set of immunizations. I think he's getting immune to her screaming these days, anyway.

On to the latest developments in the life of Isabella...

In bullet point form, of course.

1. She LOVES to lay on her playmat. She was in a bouncy seat phase, and now she's in a playmat phase. I lay her down so she can see herself in the mirror above. She talks to herself in the mirror, sticks her hands in her mouth, and rolls from side to side. It's so adorable.

2. She is rolling over now! I wrote down the date of her "first" rollover from tummy to back and back to tummy, but it was in the past 2 weeks or so. Today she rolled from her back to her tummy, got her bottom arm free, and rolled again onto her tummy. I'm in trouble when this girl really figures out how to move.

3. Her hands are constantly in her mouth. This is not a very recent development; it seems like she's had them there forever. She still isn't sucking her thumb, so I don't know if she will get that figured out soon or not. (The picture above is classic Boo - hands in mouth, smiling, loving her changing table. She's usually dressed, though. :-)

4. I don't think she is necessarily teething yet, but she is drooling like nobody's business. I changed her twice today because her outfit was drenched with drool. Not that I mind the changing outfits. She has to wear all those clothes sometime before she grows out of them.

5. She holds her head up really well. Her back isn't very steady yet, but I can hold her on my hip now. She's just so tiny. It feels funny to have such a tiny baby on my hip.

6. We are working on sleep training this week (training her to get to sleep by herself). It's very hard, but on the advice of many amazing moms, I believe we need to do it and now is the time for us. She is strong-willed and can scream like there's no tomorrow. Tonight was the best night so far, though. I have hope! And I have part of my evening back, which is a wonderful feeling. I was very depressed spending 2-4 hours a night putting her to sleep.

I am SO excited to find out her stats at the doctor's office tomorrow! I always look forward to seeing how much she has grown and knowing that I am the one who has nourished her to this point. I do not plan to start solids until 6 months or a little after. I am in no hurry, and I realize that eating will take a LOT longer and be a LOT messier when we get to that point. I'll take a few more months of exclusively nursing, thank you. (That's not the only reason, of course. I have done my research and believe it is in her best interests and prefer to wait until her digestive system is more developed.)

Pretty soon I want to blog about something other than my daughter. But sometimes the things I really want to say are much harder to get out. Blogging about her is very easy. :-)

No Rest for the Weary

2010-07-09T22:17:00.002-05:00

My daughter sleeps well. She rarely wakes up in the middle of the night anymore. She goes down for naps in the swing pretty well. The thing we struggle with (and by we, I mean SHE) is bedtime.

I try to do the bedtime routine of pajamas, swaddle, nurse when she seems to be getting tired. It's generally between 7:00 and 8:00. She nurses fine and appears to be sleeping to me. However, when I get up to lay her down (or actually do lay her down), she immediately starts getting fussy and going crazy. She stretches out her body and starts whining. She's all of a sudden wide awake. I walk her, rock her, sing, bounce...all the things that usually work to help her get to sleep. Nothing works. I undo her swaddle and she still freaks out.

I think she's starting to teethe, so I gave her a little Tylenol tonight to see if that would help with the pain. It didn't make a bit of difference. I started putting her to bed at 7:30 and she didn't go to sleep until 9:30. I'm at my wit's end. The rest of our day great. I don't understand why it takes so long to get her to bed. I woke her up from her afternoon nap at 4:40, hoping that not letting her sleep to late would help. (She napped until 5:30-6 the past 2 nights.) That didn't make a difference, either. I've tried putting her down earlier. I've tried keeping her up later. The end result is almost always a 2+ hour bedtime routine. I let her cry for 5 minutes tonight, and then Matt went to rock her. It took her forever to calm down from that.

I dread night time. I'm so frustrated, but I feel like it's too early to begin sleep training. Most books I read suggest 6-9 months. I don't know if anyone has any suggestions, but I figured it might be a little therapeutic to write about it at least. I'm open to anything. Except crying it out. I don't think I'm ready for that yet. :-) Come on, veteran moms...help me out! Or at least tell me that it's too early to expect anything more (she'll be 4 months next week).

Poem for Moms

2010-07-01T11:14:00.002-05:00

I've heard this poem before, but I don't remember most of it. The last two lines have always stuck in my head. I have said them over and over to myself since Isabella was born.

"I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep." Tears me up even now.

Enjoy!

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I've grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo.

The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew,
And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo;
But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren't his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow,
But children grow up as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust, go to sleep!
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

- Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

3 months old!

2010-06-23T21:48:00.002-05:00

Last week, Isabella turned 3 months old! It certainly has flown by. True to form, Heather took some amazing pictures for us! I could not have been happier with them. We ordered an 11x14 to put in a HUGE frame that we bought a few years ago. It looks amazing! My baby is now plastered all over the living room. I love it!

So three months...I figured she would still be mostly newborn-ish, but she seems so different already. She smiles a ton! I love that I can make her smile. On Friday, she started jabbering a bunch more! It's been so much fun to hear her figure out her voice. We love it. She has even started grabbing her toys, although she doesn't have a great deal of control over what she does with them yet. And, of course, everything goes in her mouth.

Last night she was nursing on my lap before bed, and I thought about how small she is. She fits nicely across my lap while she's nursing, and one of these days, she won't fit on my lap like that anymore. I get so anxious to see her reach some of the exciting milestones ahead, but when I reflect on how quickly it's going by, I remind myself to s - l - o - w d - o - w - n. I can tear up just thinking about the day when she won't be a "baby" anymore.

Isabella now screams in my face, and she is LOUD! (I can't imagine how she came to inherit that trait.) She still takes forever to go to sleep most nights. (But she sleeps for 10+ hours, so it's hard to complain.) She throws fits in the car at times that just drive me bonkers. (Other times she sleeps like an angel.) She is my baby girl, and I am enjoying every amazing and every trying moment. They are passing all too quickly.

I love Target!

2010-06-02T11:40:00.003-05:00

The title of my blog is not a surprise to anyone who knows me. But I was SO excited about my shopping trip to Target on Monday.

First of all, Isabella was such a stinker for a good portion of the car ride to and from Chicago, so I was a little nervous to take her to Cedar Falls. But she was fabulous; slept the whole way down, wonderful for almost the entire time at Target, and slept the whole way back as well. Yeah, baby Bella!

Second, everything in the picture above (except the blue and yellow dress on the left) was $1.00 each. Yes, ONE DOLLAR! The dress was only two dollars, too! I totally scored; it was hard not to buy every single one dollar onesie and top since I know so many baby girls now. But alas, my budget does not allow me to clothe all of them. The black & white little container is hot pink inside; PERFECT for her room!

I also got a few great deals at Kohl's over the weekend and was able to buy a couple things for Isabella at H&M (my first time there since she was born; actually, first time since I knew I was going to have a baby!). I have to blog about our awesome eating out experience, too, but I'll save that for next time.

Yeah, Target! I hate your return policies, but I cannot resist your clearance. Thanks for making my weekend.

Things I Love About Isabella

2010-04-30T16:44:00.003-05:00

My typing is now mostly done one-handed while nursing, so I thought a list might be easier to compose under these circumstances.

Here are some of the things I love about Isabella:

The noises she makes while eating. They are SO adorable!
Her cute waking up cry. It's not really a cry; more of a squawk.
Sometimes she forgets to swallow and almost chokes on her milk. Obviously, choking is not cute, but once she's done coughing and ready to go again, I think it's cute that she doesn't know choking should be scary. She is so calm about it. For some reason I think it's really cute.
She loves loud music. My daughter doesn't fall asleep to lullabies; it's loud, fast, get-your-blood-pumping music for her. I totally love that.
I love her jerky hand and arm movements. I know she will grow out of it, and I will miss it.
She BARELY opens her mouth to eat. It frustrates me to no end because, well, it hurts. But at the same time her tiny mouth is so stinkin cute. I'm working on being more patient and making her open wider before latching.
Most of the time when she's eating, she has her hand up by the side of her face in the cutest little, I'm-thinking-really-hard or I'm-so-perplexed kind of way. I can't find a picture of it, and I can't take one that would be appropriate for posting in a public forum, so you'll just have to imagine it as best you can.
I love watching her get more expressive and active. It's so fun to discover her new faces and sounds.
I love dressing her! Holy cow. It's so much more fun than I even anticipated it would be. She's cute in everything she wears. She's cute in nothing, too! (Not that I've seen it much since, well, I like dressing her so much.)
She gets attention wherever we go! I suppose every baby does, but it makes me feel like I have the cutest baby ever. Oh, wait. I do.

She's getting fussy, so I'd better stop. Thanks for reading the ramblings of a lovestruck mommy.

I'm a Mom!

2010-04-10T13:22:00.003-05:00

This is my first post-baby blog! So much pressure...where to start? Well, I don't even know if I have time to go into the whole birth story. I'm trying to squeeze this in while she's napping, and I have no idea how long that will last. If you're really interested, Matt and I recorded our versions of the birth story on DVD so we have it for posterity. SO glad we did. But it's way too long to post online, so I can burn you a copy if you want to hear it.

Isabella will be 4 weeks old tomorrow. It has been a long 4 weeks, but it's also flown by. Matt stayed home with us the first week, and we had a great time together. My Mom came the next week, and it was great to have her help. Now we've had 2 weeks at home "by ourselves." She still has yet settle into any kind of routine; some nights she'll sleep 3, 4, or 5 hours at a shot, and other nights she'll wake up every 1.5-2 hours. I never know what I'm going to get. The lesson of the first 4 weeks is...go with the flow. :-) I'm still alive, and so is she. So we must be doing all right.

I am dying to know what she weighs. It's been almost 2 weeks since we went to the doctor, and she was 6 pounds, 3 ounces then. I put on a newborn onesie today and it was still HUGE. Seriously. Huge. So maybe she'll grow into them in the next few weeks. I'm going to be hosed with all this winter clothing that will fit her...oh, sometime this summer. :-)

We have actually gone out 2 times without Bella already. The first time I didn't leave any milk, but the second time we left a little bit and she took it (yeah!). Tonight we're planning to go out again, and I have 2 2 oz. bottles to leave. Yeah again! It's so nice to have a good pump and to be able to get away. Although, after we're gone about an hour, I'm ready to see her again. It's this funny, you-drive-me-crazy-sometimes-but-I'm-your-Mom-and-I-love-you-and-miss-you-already thing.

We've also planned our first road trip with Bella (not including Waterloo/Cedar Falls). We are going to Des Moines for Mother's Day weekend. She finally gets to meet Aunt Steph, Uncle Jim, and cousin Hannah! Yeah! I'm scared to death that she'll scream the entire 2 hour drive, but I'm praying about it. Lord, please help us.

These are the ramblings of a sleep-deprived new mom. I probably should get something else done while she's napping.

Come on, Baby Bella!

2010-02-22T18:50:00.001-06:00

I will be 37 weeks tomorrow! It has totally flown by, and I’m checking all my lists, but I think we are pretty much ready for Isabella to be here! At least, we have all the “stuff” to take care of her and to make taking care of her a little easier on her first-time mommy. I’m not sure I will ever be completely ready, but thank God that I only have to deal with one day at a time.

So, let’s see…here’s the update as of today:

1. The nursery is painted! I am so glad her room is finally ready to be set up. It's hard to tell, but we went with a light gray and I love it.

2. The crib is here, but I can’t put it together by myself (in fact, I’m not sure I’ll be much help at all). Hopefully I can convince Matt to work on it one night this week. I know a cookie recipe that might serve as a decent bribe…

3. The dresser is on its way and should be here sometime between the end of this week and the middle of next. Hopefully sooner!!

4. All her newborn and 0-3 month clothes are washed and ready to be placed in the dresser.

5. The changing table is here and in the room! Mom covered some foam for a changing table pad. It looks so great – I was so excited when I found it for $40 on craigslist (cherry baby furniture is hard to find used!), and I love it even more in person.

6. The rocking chair is here and ready to move into the room. Just one small task Matt has to finish before it can get moved in. He took a nice long nap in it yesterday, so I think it’s sufficiently broken in. I may have played some games on my iPod on it yesterday, too.

7. Mom and I installed the car seat bases in both cars on Saturday. I’m keeping the car seat in the house for now, but I may put it in the Denali next week.

8. Have I mentioned that I’m completely in love with her stroller and car seat? Mom found it on craigslist (another great deal), and it’s so incredibly nice. We went with the Chicco Cortina Keyfit 30. It’s similar to the color of the Adventure but a prettier, closer to lime shade of green (it's a discontinued pattern). I’m just thrilled with it. Yes, we checked the expiration date before buying and it’s fine. :-)

9. I put together her swing last week, so it’s ready!

10. I ordered the bunting bag (car seat cover) and bouncy seat last week, so they should be here by the end of this week, too. I decided it’s just too cold and windy to deal with covering her with a blanket, and who knows how long this winter will last at this point!

The list goes on, but I guess this is most of the main stuff. Wow…I am amazed that it all came together. There were moments I wasn’t sure what we would get and when we would get it, but we had some pretty great deals and great baby shower gifts, too. My bags are pretty much packed, and this morning I decided to throw in my makeup and glasses each morning in case I need to grab stuff in a hurry. I can’t forget those! There are a few other things that don’t fit in the bags, but my lists are ready for reference, too.

My Mom has been amazing. I didn’t know how much I would depend on her through the pregnancy, and I’m sure it will continue once Bella is here. I’m so grateful that she’s encouraging and supportive and helpful. My sisters are awesome, too – I wish they lived closer! It’s been fun to share the experience of pregnancy with Beth, and Steph has tons of great advice since she did so much research on stuff for Hannah. I can’t wait until Bella can meet them and both of her cousins, too!

Matt has been so great, too. What a ride it’s been! He has worked SO hard to get the bathroom done and has made some seriously amazing progress. In addition, having laundry has been, well, just fabulous. Don’t make fun of me until you spend 4 years doing laundry at the laundromat/other people’s homes! Nothing compares to walking downstairs and throwing in a load, especially in winter with a big pregnant belly. I know it’s been a stressful time for him, but he has dealt with it so well, and he has been incredibly supportive and loving. I am so grateful that we get to share the experience of first-time parenthood. There is no one else I would rather share it with. (I know that sentence ends with a preposition, but at 37 weeks, I’m less inclined to care. It’s just a blog, right?) I love you so much, baby, and I know you will be the best daddy Bella could ever want.

So…here we go! I don’t know when she will decide to make her appearance, but I am pretty ready at this point. As ready as I’ll ever be, anyway. So, Miss Bella, keep growing until you’re ready. But you can stop kicking me so much any day now. You are already one tough cookie!

To Bella

2010-01-11T15:24:00.002-06:00

You are so active today! It’s not much different than normal, but I am enjoying it. At the same time, I am very anxious to meet you. You are almost 31 weeks, and 9 more weeks just feels like forever to me. I want to know what it is like to hold you in my arms. I want to touch your soft skin and see your beautiful face. I want to see your daddy hold you. I want to feel the love that fills my heart the first moment I hold you. It seems so close yet so far away. I already love you – I love feeling you and your gymnastic-like movements. I love reading and talking to you. I love thinking about how you will look and touching your tiny fingers and toes. I love imagining how you’ll look in all the adorable clothes I have for you. Some days the anticipation is so great, and today is one of those days. I hope the time goes by fast until we meet you, Bella.

Love,
Your Mommy

Random Dozen, a.k.a. The Donut List

2009-11-13T21:28:00.002-06:00

I stayed up late last night, and now I'm watching Hannah play. This is the best I can do for a new blog under the circumstances. Linda manages to come up with a great variety of questions, so it works for me.

1. What was the last song you listened to?
Something from a Christmas mix CD in the car this evening. The last one I remember is "Virgin's Lullaby" from the Nativity Story soundtrack.

2. Have you ever had “buyer’s remorse” over anything?
Oh, yeah. Countless clearance items that were a "steal" at the time and didn't ever seem to get picked from the closet. I'm working on being more discriminating about my clearance purchases. And leaving the tags on items as long as possible. I love returning...it's like making your money back.

3. What is something in your life that you are thankful for now that you didn’t think you would be at the time of the event (something that seemed ill-timed, inconvenient or hurtful which turned out to be a good thing)?
I can think of multiple answers to this question, but I'm deciding if I can come up with one is appropriate to share in this setting. I would say that I am thankful I stayed in Waverly. The first year...or two was really tough. I had a network of friends that I considered family in Springfield, and leaving was very difficult. I never wanted to stay in Waverly long anyway, so I kept my distance and therefore felt quite alone for a while. I never could have imagined what I would go through with some of the friends who became family here in Waverly, and now I feel as close to them as I did to my friends there. It's amazing how God can move in ways you never imagined.

Oh, and did I mention the fact that I met my husband in Waverly, 3 years after I moved here. It goes without saying, but God knew what He was doing.

4. Do you watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade every year? If so, do you have a favorite float or balloon?
I did as a kid, but it's been a while since I eagerly anticipated it. I don't mind if it's on in the background, but it doesn't terribly interest me anymore.

5. Share a quote, scripture, poem or lyric which has been an inspiration to you lately.
I pray not that you would find Jesus and He would give you everything you need, but that you would find Jesus and He would be enough. (paraphrase from Matt Chandler, pastor of The Village Church)

6. This is meant to be a fun question, and this is a G-rated blog, but please share a “guilty pleasure,” something that you enjoy that’s probably not the most edifying, time-worthy or healthy thing you could be indulging in. Did I mention this blog is rated G?
Sugar and plenty of it.

7. What Thanksgiving food are you looking forward to?
All of them? Actually, we're not with my family this year, and I'm not yet terribly familiar with Matt's family's traditional foods. I have made one or two things when we've been with them in years past, so I'll choose my dishes based on my cravings at the time I imagine.

8. What is your favorite book to read to children, or what was your favorite childhood book?
My mom says that my favorite book was the Kitty Book, and she bought it for my baby girl.

9. Do you collect anything? (Feel free to post a photo.)
I'm a stockpiler, so I could say that I collect lots of things. But I have no special collections to speak of.

10. Gift bags or wrapping paper?
I absolutely love wrapping gifts, but I end up using gift bags for time's sake more often.

11. Share an after-school memory from when you were younger. What was your routine like on an average day?
I remember the years when my mom ran a child care in the home. Coming home from school was great because there were all these cute little kids waking up from their naps to play with.

12. True story: Once, in a job interview, I was asked this question and told there would be no clarifying; I simply had to answer the question: “When you’re fishing, do you feel for the fish?” So what about you? Do you feel for the fish??
I thought about changing this to something different as I struggle to even know how to respond, but I respect the original poster, so I'll just say...no. Feeling for the fish sounds gross, so I wouldn't do it.

Trust

2009-11-08T15:10:00.003-06:00

Trusting God can be such a learning process. Some circumstances in life have caused me to think more about what it means to trust God in painful, devastating times. Sometimes there are things that are so private that we are left to deal with them mostly alone, hopefully with a few select others that God provides. Some of these situations leave deep scars that take a long time to heal.

Last week I spent some time thinking about the leftover pain that can make it difficult to trust again; yes, even to trust God. I realized that, in order to trust God fully, I must release all my circumstances to Him. I must make peace with the fact that the same pain that came my way in the past could in fact recur should He see fit. I'm not saying that God sends painful, difficult circumstances our way, although sometimes I believe He does. But even if He sees fit to allow them to enter my life again, I must believe that He knows best. The problem comes when my self-protective instinct jumps in and decides that it would be better to not experience that depth of pain again. Anything is better than walking through that again, so I walk around on guard and doing everything I can to keep the pain and the pain-causing people at a distance. It's a natural reaction, but that doesn't mean it's the right response for a child of God. I should trust God enough to know that if He allows pain to come my way, it is for my good and His glory (see Romans 8:18 and 8:28).

His glory - I can get that one. My response to pain can bring Him glory. My attitude in pain can bring Him glory. My choice to use pain to push me closer to Him brings Him glory.

My good - this one is much harder to grasp. I forget how closely "my good" and "His glory" are related. I also have a tendency to look at "my good" in a childish way; anything that makes me happy and fits exactly into my expectations is good in my simplistic definition. How quickly I forget the great good that has come from great pain. It's hard to admit, but it's true in many ways.

I have a choice every day. Will I trust myself to figure out the best way to make it through this life? Or will I trust my Father, the One who loved me before I was born and loves me more than I can imagine? Do I really trust Him? When I consider what it means to give it all up in trusting Him, I struggle some days to answer in the affirmative. I'm not perfect, but thanks be to God who knows my going out and my lying down; He is familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue, He knows it. He hems me in behind and before; He has laid His hand upon me.*

To know Him is to trust Him. Oh, Lord, I want to know You more.

*Adapted from Psalm 139:3-5.

Random Dozen

2009-11-05T19:56:00.000-06:00

I really haven't taken part in Linda's Random Dozen too often, but it is so fun to read others that I thought I would go for it again.

1. It's early morning, about 2:00AM, and you're driving home. You come to a red light and sit there. There is no one in sight for miles around. Do you wait it out or run the light? Would I ever be driving home at 2 a.m.? That's hard to understand when I go to bed around 10 every night. But if I happened to find myself in this situation, I would most definitely wait it out. I am a rule follower to the death.

2. If you had the chance to re-do the last 24 hours, would you change anything? Oh, probably. I'd rather not think too much about it, though.

3. When you reply to someone's comment on your blog, do you reply in your comments or go to her blog and comment? (Or email her) Hmm...I usually respond on my blog I guess. I don't do it too often, though. I'm not on the Internet enough.

4. Your favorite Disney movie is: I'm so bad at favorites! Either Aladdin, Toy Story, Beauty and the Beast. Or probably something else that I can't remember right now.

5. Do you recycle? I do pop bottles and cans, but not anything else.

6. Games of strategy or games of chance? Strategy. Forget chance...I want to show what I've got!

7. Do you have any recurring dreams? Not that I know of.

8. What did you learn from your first real job? Patience. I baby-sat for a summer when I was 12, three kids who weren't all that much younger than me. That was quite a challenge!

9. Do you buy or borrow most books? It's probably split. I absolutely love to buy books, but I'm trying to check out more from the library to save money.

10. What fashion trend of the past did you say you'd never wear again but did? Wow...I'm really boring on this set of questions. I can't think of anything here, either!

11. When do you start Christmas shopping? Whenever I can find stuff, but I haven't started yet this year.

12. Have you ever been so happy that you literally jumped up and down for a few seconds? If so, what was the occasion? Yes. I get this happy fairly often. I remember jumping all over Tina's deck with her when I told her I was pregnant. That was fun.

In Full Swing

2009-11-04T19:21:00.003-06:00

I'm 21 weeks today! What a week it has been. I have definitely been more emotional during the pregnancy (thank you, pregnancy hormones), but this week has been off the charts.

Monday: We went home for lunch. I grabbed a few fun size candy bars to take upstairs with me. I was finishing the Twix when I looked down and noticed my M&M's were gone. I turned to my husband and saw the M&M's in his hand. "Are you eating my M&M's?" I asked. (It was probably more like, "ARE YOU EATING MY M&Ms??!?!?!?!?!" Or something like that.) "I was going to get you more," he said. "I think that's the last ONE!" I replied. I was starting to tear up, and I realized how ridiculous this must be. Crying over M&Ms? I can get more, for crying out loud. (Sorry. That was bad.) I sucked it up and went downstairs before we left. I found one last package of M&Ms, thank God. He was definitely watching out for me.

Tuesday: The computer guy comes in to work. I already have issues with this man. He is so full of himself. He loves to impress himself with his computer talk. Give me a break. Anyway, I don't want to get into the whole story, but suffice it to say that I was steaming after he had been in the lab for 5 minutes. I could barely keep it in...Tina and I exchanged many looks as I let him ask a few questions. Finally I left for lunch, but it took a couple of hours just to cool off. The best part of the day was that Tina brought me a bag of M&M's (plain AND peanut!) after lunch.

Then my husband ate one.

He's a brave man.

Wednesday: Nothing happened today. I just wanted to cry most of the morning for no real reason.

I'm not sure I want to know what tomorrow will bring. The emotional pendulum is in full swing here in pregnant-land!

Checking In

2009-10-20T17:31:00.001-05:00

It's so hard to find time to post with no internet at home, but I wanted to check in today. We had our appointment today (ended up being a 19-week appointment). I love going to the doctor...for baby stuff. :-) I anticipate hearing the heartbeat, and today I met one of the doctors for the first time. I really like her. I asked a few questions, and she was great. I'm excited that I like her! I was a little nervous. Baby's heartbeat was 156, so almost the same as last time.

We also set the rest of our appointments. There are a lot left! Since my due date was off from what they thought (should have just listened to me... :-), we have an extra one thrown in to get me on the right schedule. And at the end there are 3 weeks in a row! It was fun to get them all scheduled. And now it's 10 days until the ultrasound! I'm so excited I hope I don't explode!

That's about it. I found out I get to see Hannah in November, and I thought I had to wait until Christmas. Yeah! That was super great news.

Ready or Not...It Will Come!

2009-10-06T19:16:00.004-05:00

It was not long after I found out that I was pregnant before the big question entered my mind: "How am I going to get this baby out of here?"

I read almost all of What To Expect When You're Expecting in a matter of days, and then I decided I had plenty of time to worry about it later. Now I'm 17 weeks (well, I am tomorrow!), and even though I still have lots of time, I want to be a well-informed first time mother. A friend suggested reading the Bradley book, so I checked it out at my mom's library. I devoured it, too, but I am not completely convinced. Rather than get into all the gory details, I wanted to put it out there for my many mom friends: have you ever used the Bradley method of natural childbirth? Even if not, have you heard of it/read the book? I would be interested in any feedback or opinions from those who may be somewhat familiar with it.

I am by no means a "natural childbirth" freak. I am not a nature lover, a tree hugger, or a granola eater. I have friends who are all of these things, but I'm more of a Starbucks drinker and an "indoorsy" girl. However, the concept of natural childbirth definitely intrigues me. He has some good points. I'm just not sure about all of it. So if anyone's interested in engaging in conversation about it, I definitely am! I just thought I would throw it out there and see what I get.

A Random MEME

2009-09-21T17:34:00.000-05:00

Linda at 2nd Cup of Coffee created this MEME, and it gives me something easy to blog about for today. :-)

1. Which is worse: a long, boring meeting or standing in a return/exchange line after Christmas?

The Christmas line is worse. Usually a laptop has plenty of escape mechanisms for a boring meeting.

2. Except for maybe Rosie O'Donnell or Ann Coulter, nobody likes confrontation, yet we all have to deal with it. When you feel cornered and defensive, do you "bite back" or become passive aggressive?

I'm passive aggressive almost all the time in confrontation. But I'm learning to be a little mmore honest. I doubt I'll ever "bite back" like I wish I could.

3. Do you know anything about your genealogical background? (What country, culture, ties to prominent historical figures, or other stuff.)

My grandmother is from England and married my grandpa when he came over for the war. I'm honestly not sure of the rest.

4. What is the quickest way a person can endear him/herself to you?

Smile. Be kind. Giftcards work, too.

5. Cake, pie, cookies, or ice cream? (Note there is no "all of the above" option. You must choose one. Feel free to elaborate on flavor or memories tied to this dessert.) If you'd like, you can share a recipe, but you certainly don't have to.

Cookies. Warm, soft, slightly underbaked cookies win every time for me.

6. Females: Do you regularly change your handbag to coordinate with your outfit?

No, I don't. I stick with one for a few months then move on or back to an old one.

7. Are you task-oriented or relationship-oriented?

I'm task-oriented. To a fault at times. Not terribly so at home, but very much so at work.

8. IHOP, Bob Evans or Cracker Barrel?

Mmmm...Cracker Barrel. I haven't been in forever.

9. Have you ever left a movie in progress in a theater? Why?

I don't think I have. Now I read reviews on everything before I go see it. We don't see much, but we don't waste our money or find ourselves in shock from the ridiculous stuff that passes for entertainment these days, either.

10. What is one area of life in which you would like to develop more discipline or organization?

Writing. Playing piano.

11. Was middle school fun or painful?

Probably some of both. That's a 3-4 year span, so it's hard for me to characterize it with one word. Plus, for some reason I don't remember a whole lot. And I'm only 31.

12. What is your favorite Fall beverage?

The Pumpkin Spice Latte. I am elated when it returns to Starbucks each fall.

Where do you dwell?

2009-09-15T15:12:00.002-05:00

I listened to a podcast recently that has got me thinking.

About what I think about.

But I have read Philippians 4:8 many, many times, and this message brought it to life in a new way. My mind loves to run about haphazardly, and all manner of good and bad things will race through my mind in a given day. I am a little ADD and have a hard time focusing on one thing at a time, so my mind wanders a lot. As I listened to his in-depth talk on each of the areas that God tells us to think about, I wondered what kind of woman I would be if I really thought like this all the time. It's messing with me. I don't have an answer, but I'm very captivated by the idea of capturing my thoughts so they fall into the Philippians 4:8 categories.

Just something to think about. If you're interested, you can read the transcript here or download the podcast here.

Ho-Hum Summer

2009-09-07T15:55:00.003-05:00

HA! Yeah, right! I haven't blogged for a while, but the three of you that read this now know why! I'm now 12 weeks pregnant (almost 13!), and I am greatly anticipating the end of the first trimester. I am absolutely thrilled to have survived it as there were times that I thought it would do me in! Matt and I have already had lots of fun telling our parents, families, friends, talking about names, finding a crib (already!), hearing the heartbeat at 10 weeks and an ultrasound, too. I have a pregnancy journal, so I enjoy keeping that up to date.

Our (amazing, incredible, so-good-to-me-I-don't-deserve-it) friends threw us a surprise baby shower last night. And that was definitely a surprise! I wasn't having a very good weekend, so when they sprung it on me...well, I was very overwhelmed by their kindness. I don't have any pictures yet since we didn't have our camera, but they took some, so hopefully I can post some soon. They wanted to throw one that Matt could come to, which I thought was so sweet. They had a baby food identifying contest for the guys, and everyone guessed the birthdate, weight, and sex of the baby. Most of the girls guessed it would be a girl...most of the guys guessed we'll have a boy. :-) It will be fun to see if anyone guessed right!

We have a few calm weeks, and then we will have some traveling fun at the end of September and middle of October! I'm excited to visit my sisters and celebrate Hannah's birthday in October. Hopefully, I'll be showing by then, too! The way I'm eating, it shouldn't be a problem.

Blog for Hannah

2009-07-20T10:40:00.000-05:00

I blogged a couple months ago about my precious niece and her grobaby diapers. Well the company is having another giveaway and my blogless sister has asked me to post some info about it here so she can receive a box of the Natural Baby Companies Tiny Bubbles. If you're interested in reading more about the detergent click on this link.

To Have or Not to Have

2009-06-27T14:47:00.002-05:00

We don't have the Internet at home. I know that is hard to imagine for some people, but we live in the country...enough out of town that we would have to get dial-up (not happening) or satellite internet, which is pretty expensive. We didn't really have a computer until a few months ago, anyway. Now we do have a laptop, but we really don't even have the time to get online at home. It seems that the evening flies by, so we don't need to waste more time by messing around online. There are times it would be nice; I have to wait until I can get my lapotop somewhere with wireless internet to download new podcasts and bank statements. But I just can't get past the fact that, even without watching TV, we can't get the stuff done that we need to do. Why add internet to the mix? It doesn't seem to make sense. So for now we'll be without it. Which means I don't get to blog very often, and I wish I did. But a lot of the things that are going on in my life are not bloggable anyway. God is doing a lot in my heart, and I share it with a select few that I do life with. For now that's all I'm comfortable doing.

I still miss Melanie. I wanted to keep the last post at the top of my page...there's something about that shaving cream everywhere that just screams Melanie.

Stories of Shaving Cream and Friendship

2009-06-16T12:59:00.006-05:00

This is Melanie. She likes shaving cream. She is eating it, and I am spraying it in her mouth.

Melanie does crazy things like eat shaving cream, throw cheeseballs, and in general try to find trouble wherever she might be. She also does crazy things like love the unlovable, move out of a lovely home into a camper, and in general does her best to follow God with abandon.

Melanie has taught me a lot in our friendship. More than anyone else I have ever known, Melanie has taught me that people matter more than things. She holds her stuff loosely, and she gives and gives beyond what might seem "sensible" to others. She gives money, time, talents, and she gives of her beautiful, loving heart, even when she's in danger of running out of herself.

Melanie has walked with me through some of the hardest days of my life. I have tried to walk with her through some of hers as well. Melanie is moving, and I am so happy for her. This will be a great adventure for Melanie and her family. God has given them such a heart to love others, and I know He will expand that even more as they grow and minister in a new place.

I will miss her desperately, miss stopping at her house to chat, kissing and hugging, tickling and laughing with her kids, and dropping off Junior Mints when the mood strikes. I will miss coffee with her and dinner for our birthdays. I will miss crying and laughing over pretty much anything. But God has taken Melanie on an amazing journey, and this move is going to draw her closer to Him. I know it is. So I will pray for Melanie and her family and for God to keep using them and to bless them with love and laughter wherever they go.

Save a place for me, because I can't wait to come visit you in our new home. And thanks for selling us your house, Mel. Even though I don't know what to do with it sometimes, there is something special about living where you lived and mowing the grass you mowed. I'm happy to walk the ground you walked on, my dear friend. I'll take care of it until you come back to visit.

For My Beautiful Niece

2009-05-31T14:46:00.001-05:00

This post is for all my friend with diaper duty on the mind....I'm doing my sister a HUGE favor by posting this little ditty about the new gro baby cloth diaper. See she wants to try it, but is too lazy, or busy since she has a 7 month old, to set up her own blog and they are giving them away FREE if you'll post some info on your blog about it, so here I am! They seem really cool, instead of changing the outer shell all the time you can just snap out the insert and be ready to put in another, you only have to change the shell twice in a day! Too cool, huh? Well, if you wanna learn more check it out here...I'll stop gabbing about it now!

I love you, Hannah!

Do I see a bathroom in the near future?

2009-04-07T15:13:00.005-05:00

My husband (then boyfriend) bought this house in September 2005. It isn't your typical house. It is (was) a church in its former life. Our dear friends lived in it as their first home for about 9 years. Then they sold it to Matt.

Matt lived in the house for a few months before he asked me to marry him in December. I requested two things before our wedding: a redone bathroom and laundry facilities (he had none at the time). I actually had a washer and dryer, but he needed to re-work some stuff in order to hook them up.

So he began working on the bathroom. Ok...not right then. I think he actually began about 6 weeks before the wedding. Ambitious, right? Or procrastinatious. (That's my made up word in honor of you, Nate.) Here's a picture of the demo night:

The bathroom proved to be more daunting than he expected. He had moved back into his parent's house since his shower was now gone, and he and his dad spent as much time as they could working on the remodel. We picked out a lot of things together: the vanity, sinktop, lights, shower, floor tiles, and more. It was fun. Matt had a great floor plan that didn't pan out, so he re-designed it a number of times before coming up with the final version.

At any rate, I began to realize that this wasn't going to happen before the wedding (April 1). So I gave him a pass a couple weeks before the wedding. I didn't want the last few days before the wedding to be so stressful for him, and I knew it wouldn't happen no matter how hard they worked. So when we returned from the honeymoon...it was time to get moving on the bathroom! It ended up taking until mid-July to get the shower in working order. If you're calculating, that's 3 months without a shower. THREE MONTHS. Now it's hard to remember it, but we trucked to his parents' EVERY morning to shower and get ready. I do not miss those days.

So the shower was finished in July. Of 2006. Why am I writing about this in 2009? Because progress basically stopped at that point and has trickled since then. We had some other things going on in our life and marriage, and I chose not to make the bathroom my battle for a while. A long while it seemed. But a few weeks ago Matt and his dad started working on it again. This is a picture from about two weeks ago:

I thought I had a picture with the drywall, but now I find that I don't. However, this is all covered in drywall and, as of last night, they framed out the soffit to hide the pipe that runs along the ceiling in the left side of the picture. The next step is drywalling the soffit and the large beam in the middle/right part of the ceiling. (It doesn't look so large in this picture, but it is really big.) There is some more drywalling on the wall that is opposite the one you see here. But it's starting to look more finished and...gasp...the progress has given me hope that I may yet have a full bath in my own home!

Now, as I sit at my in-law's house working on 3 weeks' worth of laundry, if I could only get some progress on the laundry front.

A girl can dream, can't she?

I live in a horror movie.

2009-04-04T16:08:00.005-05:00

My last post was related to a very scary book I was reading. I finished it this week...I finally took it upstairs and finished it from the safety of the couch. No more of that scary basement business. I didn't really like the ending. But at least it's over.

But real life brought some horror-ness of its own. It was actually about a week and a half ago. We returned from being out of town, and apparently it was incredibly windy. The side door of our home has an old screen door that my husband has wanted to replace for a while. Apparently the wind got to it before we did, because it looked like this when we returned:

Just a little scary. While we were sleeping, the wind picked up again. The door was making a lot of noise, so Matt got up and rigged something to keep it from slamming against the house all night. So I woke up to this set up:

I'm not sure, but it seems like waking up in the morning while you're in the midst of reading a book about a serial killer and seeing this as you walk downstairs is not exactly comforting. Just maybe.

Facing My Fears

2009-03-26T16:59:00.001-05:00

I just got into Ted Dekker's books a few weeks ago, and I am on my fifth one now. I'm not sure if I'll make it through this one, though. It's about a serial killer, and so far it's got me on edge. Skin. That's a pretty creepy title. Or at least a pretty creepy-looking cover. Look at the red lettering...and the face that looks like it's sinking into the sand. Ew.

I like suspense and scary stories, but I have started reading while I ride the exercise bike at home. It's motivation to get me reading, especially with the recent page turners I have devoured. However, living in the middle of the country and riding the bike in the basement of our large house/church when I'm alone...I'm just not sure how I feel about finishing this one under such conditions. I already moved the bike so that I face the basement while riding. There is NO possible way anyone could sneak up behind me. This morning when my time was up, my heart was beating a little faster as I rounded the corner to fill my water bottle and return it to the refrigerator. When I ride tonight, hopefully it will be less fear-inducing. Maybe Matt will be home by then. I'm about 120 pages into the story, so I am wavering between finishing it and finding out what happens or quitting now and moving onto something less...murderous.

Stay tuned.

New Beginnings

2009-03-18T17:44:00.000-05:00

I was trying to find a picture from when I moved to Waverly. This one (me in the middle of my sisters Steph and Beth) is dated from January 2001. I moved in February 2002, but this is as close as I'm able to get. It's amazing to think about how much has changed in seven years. How much I have changed.

I scarcely recognize myself. I'm not talking about physically, although I have definitely changed there. I'm talking about the steps I have taken in the journey to the woman God has called me to be. This seven years (almost one-quarter of my life!) has brought challenges I never anticipated, pain I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. It has also brought deeper joy and greater love than I had ever experienced.

So in this time of transition from the ministry that brought me here to the unknown future that lies ahead of me, I reflect on God's goodness. I rejoice in God's grace and love. I am amazed at the joy that comes from knowing Him. Even though the next seven years will likely bring more change than I can comprehend today, I eagerly anticipate knowing Him more and seeing Him revealed in each moment of each day that lies ahead.

"If the Lord delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand. I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread." Psalm 37:25-26 (NIV)

Matt's birthday surprise

2009-03-10T18:37:00.000-05:00

I kept a birthday secret for Matt this year. I kept it for a VERY long time. It was probably close to two months, and I am not good at deception, so this was quite a challenge. He turned 30 on Sunday, so I thought this year should be special. I found this B&B, and I knew he would like the room. They also have a home theater in the basement. We were the only guests that evening, so we had the place to ourselves! It was great; the theater seats were insanely comfortable, and we watched "Trans-Siberian" (too scary for me; I don't necessarily recommend it unless you like being afraid for your life). We followed up with parts of "The Transporter" since it's difficult to end the evening on a super scary note.

On Saturday, I took him to House on the Rock. He loves that place. I tolerate it, so I knew that he would appreciate the gift of going there and me going with him. I brought a book that I happened to check out at the library on Friday. It was great; I am SO glad that I thought to grab it and throw it in the camera bag. I read the whole thing! (It's about 100 pages long.) I moved from light source to light source devouring my new book as Matt took pictures of, well, everything. From every possible angle. I resisted the impulse to hurry him along. This was his birthday gift; I was determined to let him enjoy it. And he did enjoy it very much.

On Sunday, the day of his birthday, we had some friends over for snacks and games and hanging out. Wow, did they bring some incredible food. We need to have friends over more often. Banana bars with cream cheese frosting, homemade guacamole, spinach/cheese dip, smokies wrapped in bacon, brownies with ice cream and hot fudge...are you hungry yet? It was a wonderful way to celebrate Matt's birthday.

He took the camera to work, so I'll try to get it back and post a few B&B pictures and maybe a House on the Rock one. :-) Whew - I am so glad the secret's out!

31 Years

2009-01-21T22:09:00.001-06:00

You probably can't tell by the picture, but my office was decorated to the max for my 31st birthday. My husband planned a surprise an hour (sometimes more!), thus the large envelope with instructions on where to find my surprises. He did the most amazing job of making my birthday incredibly special. I have a couple more pics on the camera, but I'll have to get those out later. My birthday was great because...

I made monkey bread for breakfast (and snacked on it all day).
My sister sent me a very sweet card that I opened in the morning.
Tina gave me an amazing, all-day long, present-an-hour gift, too! (Where did she find the time?)
We ate at Panera with some amazing friends!
Starbucks.
Cookies.
iTunes gift card from Matt!
Pick-your-own gift card from Beth!
Super sweet words from my loving husband.
Birthday wishes from so many friends.
Beautiful flowers from Mel!

It was a wonderful day. I am so grateful.

My New Toy

2008-12-26T22:25:00.003-06:00

I'm a LOT of years behind the iPod craze. Yes, I have been pretty happy with my Dell DJ for quite a while. But this year I took a liking to the new iPod nano. Behold...my Christmas present.Yeah, it's hot pink. HOT pink. It rocks. So far I have listened to very little music and played a lot of games. I am really looking forward to listening to music and podcasts in the near future, though.

But seriously, it's been a fun Christmas and we have played lots of games and had tons of fun with family. My sister, brother-in-law, and new niece are coming to visit tomorrow, so we have some after-Christmas fun still to anticipate. Yeah!

Hannah's First Thanksgiving

2008-12-05T18:41:00.001-06:00

Hannah was a busy girl while her mom was away! We're trying to be a good, positive influence on our new niece.

Happy first Thanksgiving, Hannah!

Welcome Hannah Grace

2008-10-15T09:13:00.005-05:00

I'm an aunt! Hannah Grace was born at 1:35 this morning. She was only five pounds, nine ounces! What a tiny, sweet baby. Melanie and I are going to road trip it down there this weekend. It's 8 hours each way, and we only have Friday night and Saturday to do it. It's totally worth it, though!! I can't wait to meet her!

Song of Hope

2008-10-14T17:47:00.000-05:00

The latest New Life Worship CD has been in my CD player nonstop. I bought the downloaded version, so I don't have access to lyrics and can't find them online. I typed these out because it's one of my favorites. (Warning: they may not be correct. There are few words that were hard to decipher. I gave it my best shot.) It has encouraged me so much as I have listened to it. Repeatedly. I hope the lyrics encourage you, too. Pick it up if you have a chance. It's totally worth it.

Greater

Find rest, my soul

Confess your freedom

Surrender all

Embrace your healing

I will cast my cares

You are always there

You are greater, greater than the fight

That rages for my life

I have found my rest is in

You are brighter, breaking through the night

Lighting up my sight

I have seen my rest is in You

Find hope, my soul

You know He’s with you

My Savior God

Still I will praise You

I will cast my cares

For You have always cared

You are greater, greater than the fight

That rages for my life

I have found my rest is in

You are brighter, breaking through the night

Lighting up my sight

I have seen my rest is in You

His yoke is easy

His burden is light

I have decided

I’m gonna fix my eyes

On the Perfecter

The Author of my faith, Jesus Christ

Boys and Their Toys

2008-09-26T10:22:00.004-05:00

Here it is! It's very nice. I love it. I drove it yesterday! I can't wait to take everyone for a ride in it.

Who brings a computer on vacation?

2008-09-25T17:17:00.002-05:00

I am usually pretty unplugged on vacation. I just figured I would rather upload some pictures to Facebook than sit mindlessly in front of the TV while my husband took a nap this afternoon. So I'm on the computer in the Rocky Mountains. Have I mentioned it's gorgeous here? We're staying in Estes Park tonight and spending the rest of our weekend with Mandy (Matt's sister) in Denver. We have had a great time so far. I am so sad that I can't be with Melanie tomorrow. Her brother Craig loved spending time in Colorado, so I am thinking about her and him as we view the gorgeous backdrop throughout the area. If I can't be with her to remember her brother, then it's fitting that I'm here to remember him.

So I'm blogging on vacation. But this is probably all you will see (or hear) of me. Hopefully I'll have some good pictures to post when we return. For now, you can check my Facebook for some new and older ones. :-)

Oh, and before I go, here's my current favorite Psalm:

Psalm 130
Out of the depths I cry to you, O Lord; O Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy.
If you, O Lord, kept a record of sins, O Lord, who could stand? But with you there is forgiveness; therefore you are feared.
I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.
O Israell, put your hope in the Lord, for wiht the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. He himself will redeem Israel from all their sins.

Miss you all! We look forward to seeing you next week. And I love you lots, Mel.

Know & Tell Friday

2008-08-08T19:26:00.000-05:00

I've never done this before, but a friend of mine does it pretty regularly, so I thought I would give it a shot today. Maybe you should, too!

1. My favorite bedtime attire is right now, shorts and a tank top. We don't have A/C in our bedroom, and there have been some hot nights!! (No, that's not what I mean, Jenni).

2. The perfect meal would include something Italian and super cheesy with a hearty side of Vinny's garlic bread and a big glass of Diet Pepsi.

3. The most memorable girl's night out I've ever had was when ...it's hard for me to pick the "most" because so many have been so great. One that stands out is when some of us went to Starbucks after the Women's Conference. It was spontaneous, which is not my nature. We had a fun time! That was in March 2008. I was 30-years-old (if I have to admit it).

4. My earliest memory is being in the basement of our first church for Sunday School. I have no idea how old I was.

5. The family is gone for the evening and I will spend my time reading, playing games on my phone, making whatever I want for dinner, and watching TV in the background. Maybe call someone I don't talk too much.

6. Right now I am blogging, of course! And drinking Diet Pepsi.

7. When I am done blogging, I am going to decide what to do next.

Happy Friday!

Go, Carl, Go!

2008-08-06T20:02:00.000-05:00

You have heard that I love NASCAR. But do you know why?

I have been a fan for around 6 years. I definitely knew about it and watched races prior to that time, but I was very casual about it. When I moved to another city, I decided to start watching more regularly so I could have something to share with my dad (he has loved cars and racing for a very long time).

I began watching and cheering for his favorites because, well, that's all I knew. I hated the ones he hated, too. Oh, that Jeff Gordon and Jimmie Johnson. To mention such names is tantamount to swearing in his presence. So I got into it and realized how interesting the season as a whole could be. Like other sports, you compete all season for the big year-end "prize" - to be the NASCAR Sprint Cup Champion. (Used to be Nextel Cup, used to be Winston Cup...but that's another blog.)

Some of my favorites did better than others. I loved Matt Kenseth. He's from Wisconsin (Midwestern-born like me), drives a Ford, and I liked his humble personality. He won the championship in 2003. Two years in a row! I loved Kurt Busch when he drove a Ford (one of the key criteria in my home). He was brash and bold, but he was a great driver. He won the championship in 2004. I cried. (Stop laughing.)

So now we skip ahead to 2008. Kyle Busch is really showing his stuff. However, Carl Edwards is up to four wins (second to Kyle in this category). Carl is from Missouri (I lived there for 7 years). He has the best personality of any guy on the circuit. He is a tough competitor, but he's friendly, gives a great interview, and is respectful. I really like Carl. I met him in October 2004. He was just entering the scene, and I was able to get the above picture with him. Single girl, single guy - my head was spinning. Sure, I'm a pastor. And Carl...well, I knew that would likely never work out well. But a girl can dream, right?

I am amazed at how popular he is now. He has the best shot to win this year's championship of all the guys I root for (Matt Kenseth, Greg Biffle, Carl, Jamie McMurray, David Ragan - they all drive for the same owner). And he won the race on Sunday! It was a great race with plenty of ups and downs. It's like a movie; you can't stop it in the middle or skip to the end lest you miss some great plot twist. It's tense; the protagonist may lose it all. And when he pulls off the win, it's that much sweeter. I didn't get to watch it until Monday, but I still screamed and yelled for him. There is nothing like your guy winning. I'm sure you agree, no matter what sport you follow.

Until Then

2008-08-05T18:26:00.001-05:00

Scripture John 7:6-8 "Therefore Jesus told them, 'The right time for me has not yet come; for you any time is right. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that what it does is evil. You go to the Feast. I am not yet going up to this Feast, because for me the right time has not yet come.'"

Observation Jesus knew the importance of God's timing and allowing Him to prepare the way. His family was not aware of it, so they pressured Him to come out of anonymity. However, Jesus was confident in knowing that the Father would show Him when the right time arrived.

Application "The right thing at the wrong time is the wrong thing." How many times have I seen this proven true in my life? Even when waiting means prolonged pain, God's timing is still best. The current pain will eventually pass, but the perseverance gained and the closer walk with God will be worth it. I know because it has been true in the past. I believe it will be true in the future. Even those closest to me may not see the timing as God's, but I must continue to trust and believe. I will hold on because I want to see "the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living" (Psalm 27:14).

Prayer Dear Father, You are my Strength and my Shield. The consequences of sin are at times devastating, especially when I didn't commit the sin. Yet I am reminded that I, too, am a sinner and am in need of Your grace daily. Please guide me with Your counsel and hold my hand today. I desperately need Your presence to comfort me and keep me safe through the storm. I may get wet, but please preserve my life so that I may tell the story of Your great goodness. Forgive me of my sins - for my bad attitude, my desire for revenge, and my ungodly thoughts. Wash me and purify my heart. Show me how to respond in a godly way. Transform my heart and mind as only You can.

Buddies

2008-07-31T19:44:00.002-05:00

Awww! Aren't they adorable?
Irresistible, right?

Free to ~~a good~~ any home.

The Mother Lode

2008-07-30T18:12:00.001-05:00

My sister is due with her first child (a daughter!) in a few months. We are having her first baby shower next weekend, so I have been looking for deals so I can get her MORE stuff! She hasn't bought a lot of clothes, which of course is one of the most fun baby shopping experiences. At least, it is for me. I found this adorable outfit at H&M:

It wasn't even on SALE. Hel-lo?!?! (Get it? Hello Kitty?) I don't know the last time I bought a clothing item at regular price. I just thought the Hello Kitty was too adorable, and I figured a hot pink sweater for a baby girl could be worn over many things in the winter. I hope so, because I think it's just precious.

Then my clearance shopping instinct kicked in and I purchased the following items for next summer:

That would be 2 pairs of shorts, 4 tank tops (all items were 98 cents each), two floral print dresses, one insanely cute smocked pink top with brown polka dots (her nursery colors will be pink and brown), and two peasant-style tops with stitching on the sleeves. Oh, and I didn't include them in the picture, but there is a set of onesies with Disney princesses dresses. One says "It's all about the..." and has a picture of a dress. SO cute! I am so glad she found out she is having a girl - it's so fun to shop when you know who you're shopping for!

Kiddies...er...Kitties

2008-07-24T19:28:00.001-05:00

So we bought kitty #2 last weekend. Legato. He he...we get to use a musical term to name our kitty! Yeah! He's much, much calmer than Monkey. That's my kind of pet. Life is stressful enough that I don't need a spastic kitty to raise my stress level when I'm supposed to be relaxing at home. Am I right here? I'm counting down the days until they become "outdoor kittens."

I suspect he may have a kitty cold (which is apparently life-threatening at his age), so we have to keep them apart for a couple of weeks. They were so funny when they were able to play together a little bit. I have no idea how to get the video from a mini-DV tape onto my computer, but I would love to so you could see it. I was scared that Monkey would definitely hurt Legato, but the vet said it would be very unlikely that he could cause him real harm.

Ohhh-kkaaayyyyy....maybe you should watch them play before you make a judgment call like that. It's pretty rough in the land of Monkey. Until he gets neutered in a few weeks. Then he may not have quite so much energy.

I hope.

Quote on Prayer

2008-07-21T19:58:00.000-05:00

"Prayer always has its effects in the spirit realm. The only thing you must remember is this: It won't be the one who reads about prayer who will move mountains, and it won't be the one who believes in prayer who will cast that mountain into the sea. It won't even be the one who aches to pray more often who will carry the day in battle. It'll go to the one who prays.

You need to pray, my friend."

-Fred Stoeker, The Healing Choice (p. 133)

Reader's MEME

2008-07-18T22:03:00.000-05:00

I found this MEME on the blog of one of my favorite authors. I LOVE to read, and I thought it looked like fun. Feel free to use it on your blog if you like!

1. Do you remember how you developed a love for reading? I believe my parents read to me quite a bit. But I have always loved reading; I can't remember NOT loving it.

2. What are some books you read as a child? Nancy Drew mysteries, Hardy Boys mysteries, Box Car kids, The Baby-Sitters Club, Sweet Valley Twins...pretty much everything I could get my hands on!

3. What is your favorite genre? Probably Christian non-fiction. I read a ton of ministry, marriage, and other Christian living books. I love Christian fiction and fiction in general, too.

4. Do you have a favorite novel? I have a difficult time choosing favorites. To narrow it down, some of the top ones I can recall are The Covenant by Terry Blackstock, The Awakening by Angela Hunt,

5. Where do you usually read? At home, on the couch.

6. When do you usually read? In the evening, often before bed.

7. Do you usually have more than one book you are reading at a time? Oh yes. I have a number of books in progress. I buy more books than I can read at one time, so they keep piling up on the floor, the shelves, the nightstand...

8. Do you read non-fiction in a different way or place than you read fiction? I usually read fiction straight through, often in a few days. If I don't have the time, I will drag it out a little more. I read non-fiction more slowly to process the content and what it means to me personally.

9. Do you buy most of the books you read, or borrow them, or check them out of the library? I buy most of them. I like to have them to loan out and I like full bookshelves. I also highlight and mark up the books that really mean a lot to me. In addition, as a future author, this is a great quote from another author: "I buy them. Because if nobody buys books, authors starve. Sad but true."

10. Do you keep most of the books you buy? If not, what do you do with them? Yes, I keep them. I loan them out as well, but I like to have them for quick access. I often plan on re-reading most of the books I have.

11. If you have children, what are some of the favorite books you have shared with them? Were they some of the same ones you read as a child? N/A

12. What are you reading now? Hmmm...I have lots of things in progress. Matt and I are reading The First Five Years by Bill and Pam Farrel together. I am also reading The Sacred Influence by Gary Thomas, In Search of Eden by Linda Windsor, a re-read of Get Out of That Pit by Beth Moore, and a book recommended by a friend called The Healing Choice by Brenda Stoeker and Susan Allen. The intended audience is wives who have been betrayed, but I have found that it applies to a much broader spectrum as the woman who writes the first half dealt with her mother's battle with cancer. Many of the truths I have read are universally applicable to everyone who has taken an "unintended journey" in life (who hasn't?). It really has given me some great tools to draw closer to God. I'm only about a third of the way through it, but it is incredible in its ability to honestly address pain and how we deal with it.

13. Do you keep a TBR (To Be Read) list? I buy what I want to read. If I can't afford everything I am interested in (generally true), I save it in my Amazon.com cart so I can retrieve it the next time I'm ready to place an order.

14. What's next? I just ordered Every Woman's Battle, Believing God by Beth Moore, and I also have Authentic Faith by Gary Thomas that I really want to start and When Sinners Say I Do...don't remember the author.

15. What books would you like to reread? A Tale of Three Kings by Gene Edwards. Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas. Joy That Lasts by Gary Smalley. Visioneering by Andy Stanley.

16. Who are your favorite authors? Oh, I have so many. I will list just a few. For non-fiction, it would be Gary Thomas, Brenda Stoeker, Beth Moore, John Ortberg, and Andy Stanley. For fiction, Angela Hunt, Karen Kingsbury, Terry Blackstock, and Dee Henderson.

Missing You

2008-07-17T21:09:00.000-05:00

When you live far from those you call family - parents, siblings, and extended family - you have to create your own family. Your friends become like family. Those you work with, minister with, and share life with are the family God has provided. I am grateful for each one I have come to know and love.

However, if you are a sister, you also know that there is no bond like a sister bond. We are linked forever by our blood and our heritage, our memories and our faces, our laughs and our shared experiences.

I have two sisters. They live 8 hours from me. One is pregnant, due near the end of October. I feel far removed from this incredible event in her life. I haven't seen her since the end of March, and I don't know when I will be able to meet her beautiful baby because of the distance between us. I talk to my sisters on the phone, but we don't get to "share life" as fully as when we lived in the same town. They still live in the same town, and sometimes I get jealous of the times they share. I am the oldest and not used to being the one left out of things.

Ministry is a different calling; if I had a choice, I would live much closer to them. But unless God allows it, I will make the best of what we have, the times we do share, and the friendship that was birthed decades ago in our cozy, childhood home.

(With Mom and Grandma)

Fading Away

2008-07-15T18:14:00.000-05:00

Psalm 102:25-27 "In the beginning, You laid the foundations of the earth, and the heavens are the work of Your hands. They will perish, but You remain; they will all wear out like a garment. Like clothing, You will change them and they will be discarded. But You remain the same, and Your years will never end."

As beautiful as this earth is, it is not forever. As much as I love my clothes/books/shoes (fill in the blank), they are temporary and will all wear out or be discarded. My feelings seem so real that I can forget what is real: God. God alone. Only God is real and everlasting. Being centered on God will provide lasting satisfaction. Nothing else will fill my deepest longings. I have been reading and re-reading and reading again the Word of God. It is the real truth I need when the lies are masquerading as truth. So in lieu of my personal thoughts, I wanted to list some other verses I have loved lately. I hope they encourage you as only God's truth can.

Psalm 27:13-14 "I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

Psalm 73:23-26 "Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

Psalm 116:1-2 "I love the Lord, for He heard my voice; He heard my cry for mercy. Because He turned His ear to me, I will call on Him as long as I live."

Psalm 91:9-12 "If you make the Most High your dwelling - even the Lord, who is my refuge - then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone."

2 Samuel 22:29-31 "You are my lamp, O Lord; the Lord turns my darkness into light. With your help, I can advance against a troop; with my God, I can scale a wall. As for God, His way is perfect; the Word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in Him."

Tagged

2008-07-07T18:33:00.003-05:00

Before I write, I had to throw in a vacation picture. LOVE the Goldmoor.

Beefy tagged me, and I have not blogged much, so this seemed like an easy one. Hopefully.
Here are the rules: All of the answers must be just one word.

1. Where is your cell phone? Desk
2. Your significant other? Hysterical
3. Your hair? Long
4. Your mother? Smart
5. Your father? Fanatic
6. Your favorite thing? Home
7. Your dream last night? Unsure
8. Your favorite drink? Starbucks
9. Your dream/goal? Trust
10. The room you’re in? Alone

11. Your church? Friendly

12. Your fear? Misunderstood

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Mothering

14. Where were you last night? Home

15. What you’re not? Quiet

16. Muffins? Pastries

17. One of your wish list items? Purse

18. Where you grew up? Des Moines

19. The last thing you did? X-ray

20. What are you wearing? casual

21. Your TV? HGTV

22. Your pets? Kitty

23. Your computer? laptop

24. Your life? Eventful

25. Your mood? Tired

26. Missing someone? Sisters

27. Your car? Cluttered

28. Something you’re not wearing? glasses

29. Favorite store? Limited

30. Your summer? Fast

31. Like (love) someone? Completely

32. Your favorite color? Red

33. Last time you laughed? Yesterday

34. Last time you cried? Yesterday

35. Who will re post this? ??

I tag Mel...I haven't talked to her in a while, and I miss her.

VBS Slacker

2008-06-25T14:50:00.004-05:00

Wow, I'm a slacker. I haven't posted in a long time. It's VBS week, so I am too mentally and physically to think of something great to post. But I can share a picture of our new baby...

He he he...did you think it was really a baby? OK, maybe not.

I am NOT a pet person. I think I have made it abundantly clear that I don't like animals. THen why, oh why, does this kitten have to be so cute? His name is Monkey. He found us, so we took him in. Our little orphan kitty. Awww.

Don't be deceived by his docile appearance in the picture. He is very annoying when he runs around like a crazy cat. Sometimes, if Matt's gone, I put him back in the cage when I get sick of hearing him jump on everything and wondering what electrical cord he is going to chew through first. Once he's old enough (2-4 weeks hopefully), he will definitely be morphing into an outdoor kitten. But we found him at 5 weeks old, and he's only 6 weeks now, so we want him to get bigger so he has a fighting chance out there as a country cat.

I never thought I'd have an indoor pet, even temporarily. What is this world coming to? Will I soon believe in global warming? (HA - that's a joke, people. I like a cute kitten; I didn't lose my mind.)

Is Summer Here Yet?

2008-06-05T17:15:00.000-05:00

When I get tired and stressed, I crave vacation. I want to get away. I want the feeling of being carefree. I am currently dreaming of some summer fun we have planned.

July 3-4 Galena (The Goldmoor - love it!)

July 11-14 Minneapolis (this and this and this)

July 19 Des Moines (my husband loves these)

August 28-September 1 Wisconsin Dells (not sure yet, but we would really like to go)

I can't stop thinking about HAVING FUN! Never mind the fact that our summer is also supposed to include re-siding and insulating part of our home, fixing the RV so we can get rid of it, finishing the half-finished bathroom...the list goes on.

OK, back to vacation. Last summer we went to California and had an amazing time...

Then we did Galena again; of course, it was awesome...

Thanksgiving was stressful with a flat tire on I-80, but still a great time...

There are so many more...Matt and I love traveling together. I can't wait to relax and see what this year's adventures will bring!

Whew!

2008-06-02T17:04:00.004-05:00

Steve and I went over VBS stuff today. VBS begins three weeks from today, and the to do list we came up with is 3 and a half pages long. My head hurts. I need to go home and think about something else for a while! I have been dying for some time off lately, but I don't see that happening before VBS. The good thing is we are staying here for a night the week after VBS. Something to look forward to for sure! We stayed in the room below (the Turret Room) for my birthday. Fun!

Tired

2008-05-22T16:52:00.002-05:00

It's been a long week. We had meetings all day Tuesday and Wednesday. It helped that it was here. I love that place. But I still have ADD, so sitting still and paying attention for hours on end is difficult for me. So I snacked. And snacked. And snacked. I'm very thankful that it's over.

My work to-do list is long from being gone those two days and busy with lots of stuff today...it includes (but is definitely not limited to):
1. Looking over the Discovery 101 class material for Pastor Marvin's class next Sunday
2. Finding some closing ceremony skits for our VBS meeting next week
3. Helping Steve start to plan the VBS All-Volunteer Meeting
4. Making a CD label for the VBS music CD
5. Working with Michelle to get everything ready for the VBS registration table next week
6. Send out next week's worship set (good thing I just remembered that)
7. Figuring out what to do for a VBS promo poster to put up around the community

I can't think about what else right now...or the to do list at home. I am just glad I can go home tonight. There is a graduation open house every day this weekend, but I am not too worried about that. I'm just glad there IS a weekend!

By the way, I really want to share the great stuff God is doing in my life. I just haven't had time to type it all out. But He is awesome and so faithful.

Oh, the Horror

2008-05-15T16:20:00.002-05:00

I just found a grammatical error in an old post of mine. I changed it, so don't even try to find it. I am mortified. I must proof my posts more diligently in the future. I am glad this blog isn't more widely read; some of my co-workers may have found fodder for great teasing.

Whew. Good thing I avoided being teased at work.

Blog Name Confirmed!

2008-05-14T20:40:00.000-05:00

OK, so we're going with "Under the Bell Tower." I like it. Now we have to take a picture and figure out how to make the header, but someday we'll get it done.

Other than that...this week is not as busy as recent weeks have been for us. I am embarrassed to say that (because of visitors) we finally put away the Christmas mess that had exploded in our living room and never went away. Yes, we had Christmas trees in our home in May. Actually, we still do but they are now evergreens instead of decked out "Christmas" trees. Matt created a park scene by grouping a bunch of evergreens (we have a lot of trees) and some other plants around our church bench. It's creative. It keeps me from having to dismantle Christmas trees...um...evergreens...only to put them back together in a few months. Now I wish we had another bench from the church to put in the entryway. I like having one there. I think I might stalk some former members of the church and see if anyone knows where they went.

That's all I can come up with now. I wish I had a picture of the park scene. I'll see what I can do when I get home and maybe post it later.

New Blog Name

2008-05-08T17:02:00.003-05:00

I need help - I want to change my blog name. My husband will design me a header, but I need a name first. Here are my options (keeping in mind that the above is our home minus all the cars in the driveway):

Church in the Lurch
Churchbound
Under the Bell Tower
God in the Living Room
Life by the Cemetery
Learning Patience from...a House

If you have any other cute ones...throw them out for me. I need something fresh.

Six Words

2008-05-05T08:17:00.001-05:00

Amie tagged me (again :-), so I will happily take on the task of listing 6 words or phrases that best describe me.

Here are the rules:
1. Write your own six-word memoir.
2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like.
3. Link to the person who tagged you in your post.
4. Tag five more blogs with links.
5. Remember to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play.

So I will give it my best here:
1. obsessive
2. ever-changing
3. hopeful
4. faithful
5. thoughtful
6. God's
I tag T, Judy, Natalie, Hannah...who else...that will have to do for now.

Great Friends

2008-04-30T16:20:00.000-05:00

I wish I had time to write a tribute to all of the great friends in my life. Just this week, one godly woman ministered to me in an incredible way. She is like a second mother to me; I have known her for over half my life. I wish I could quantify what she means to me, but it's just not possible. Thank you, Sharon, for reminding me what it means to be a godly wife and woman.

Another friend e-mailed, and it was a God thing. That's all I can say. She has been through a lot, a LOT in her nine years of marriage. What an encouragement and a support she is.

Other friends have been so loving and caring in the past few months, and some are going through their own hard times. To all my girlfriends, far and near: I love you. I can't imagine my life without you. Thank God for friendships that draw us closer to Him and give us a glimpse of His love for us.

Stealing Creativity

2008-04-27T17:41:00.004-05:00

I am a woman.

I like romance.

I love to surprise my husband.

However, I can easily get stuck in the same ruts, and we have only been together for three years and married for two years. I found this book a few months ago. I have barely touched the tip of the iceberg in flipping through it, but here's a sample:

94
Give her one Hershey's Kiss.
Give her one thousand Hershey's Kisses.

Remove all the little paper strips (that say "Kisses" on them) from a couple hundred Hershey's Kisses. Fill a little jewelry box with them. Wrap 'em up and present them to her.

Write a clever certificate explaining that the little paper slips are coupons
redeemable for one kiss each.

Not only are there 1001 ideas, but I think it inspires creativity and thinking outside the box when it comes to romance. Some ideas are far beyond my budget, and others are free. It is incredible the ideas you can come up with if you devote some time to it. (Since we don't all have a bunch of time, I'm recommending the book instead!)

If your husband complains about not being romantic naturally, get it for him. Take away his excuses! (Just don't tell your husbands I suggested it; I like them and still want to be their friend.)

It was $11.53 at Amazon. It was a great investment in my marriage. I look forward to using the ideas for a long time.

Transparency

2008-04-24T18:42:00.002-05:00

I am preparing a workshop for the women's conference at our church next weekend. I am very excited to share and believe that God has a message He wants to share through me. However, I am thinking today about how hard it can be to be transparent in life as well as in a leadership role. It's even hard to share the blunt force of my true feelings with friends or my husband at times. Can he handle the ugliness of my feelings, my pain? Can they still love me when they see the unpretty parts?

Transparency is a gift we give. Often, when I give it, I receive it back as well. So I will step out, be transparent, and allow what others "intended to harm me" to be used for good (Genesis 50:20).

So be it.

Planning a Wedding...or Building a Marriage?

2008-04-22T17:07:00.002-05:00

Wedding season is coming. I have been contemplating what to get for some of these couples. I hated getting a slew of gifts that weren't on my registry, I didn't need, couldn't figure out where to return, etc., so I am sympathetic to that perspective. I also know that they will receive many things to fill their home but not much to help their minds and hearts adjust to being a husband and wife. This is one of the best (if not the very best) books I have read on marriage. It challenged me and changed my thinking in many ways.

What if God created marriage to make you holy more than to make you happy?

I think I will throw this in the gift bag along with a cookie sheet or cake pan. I wonder which will do more good for their future?

I love Amie

2008-04-21T17:13:00.000-05:00

I've intended to come back at random points in the past few months. I'm back because Amie tagged me. I needed to come back anyway. Thanks for the excuse, Amie.

The rules for this meme are as follows:

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.

2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog; some random, some weird

3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by linking to their names/blogs

4. Leave a comment on their blog to let them know they are tagged

I will do my best here to find 7 things of interest about me.

I love Hostess 100-calorie packs; specifically, the chocolate cake and cinnamon streusel ones. I eat one almost every day.

I bring my own ice to work. At some point, bags of ice in the freezer were nowhere to be found, and I like to drink my pop with ice. So I started filling Ziploc bags with ice in the morning and bringing it with me a few times a week. I don't think it's that weird, but when Bill made fun of me and my ice, I realized other people may see it as so. I'm not terribly concerned about it; I brought ice again today.

I am 30 years old and do not have a washer or dryer hooked up in my home. (That's not weird as much as it is very, very sad.)

I love "What Not to Wear." I constantly evaluate my wardrobe on the basis of "The Rules."

My sisters and I grew up playing church in our front yard. We sang worship and special music with the legs of our trampoline as microphones. Not the huge trampolines they have now, but the little ones with the super-short legs. I also preached and prayed. I guess it was a pre-cursor of things to come...

I always thought that my love of NASCAR and some other spectator sports would be a big "plus" in getting a man. After all, they love sitting on the couch with the remote watching sports all weekend, right? I found the one who does not. And, ironically enough, I am very grateful. He is creative and interesting and, although he boggles me with the things he comes up with, I am glad we don't obsess over football games or baseball stats or even NASCAR points. (Trust me, I have seriously lightened up on the NASCAR thing since being married to Matt. I even gave up the chance to see a race this year.)

I love pictures. I get pretty upset if an important occasion passes and I do not have a picture by which to commemorate it. I am usually willing to ask passing strangers to take a picture because the chance of not getting one at all is too much to risk. Thankfully, we have some pretty great pics taken by total strangers, such as this one from our second anniversary:

As for tagging people, I have no idea. I'll go with Haleigh and Mary. I know it's not seven, but it will have to do.

Donuts Rule

2007-09-20T17:01:00.000-05:00

I just want to say that Dunkin' Donuts is awesome. The Boston Kreme is my favorite. My husband introduced me on our Chicago trip last year, and we have been best friends ever since. You should try it sometime.

Purple Weekend

2007-09-17T13:01:00.000-05:00

This was my purple weekend. I won this book at a c onference.

And I won this bathroom by having the best husband in the entire world.

Before:

Three days and very little sleep later:

He picked out all the fixtures without input - we had talked a little bit about it, but in a future, this is what I might want someday, kind of way. He even asked me while I was gone how tall I am. He was trying to decide where to place the wall sconces so I could get the best light for doing my makeup. Does it get any better than that?

Think about a few days without your spouse - even though you miss him or her, you try to think of the things you can do with a little alone time: read a book (or a magazine if you're my husband), watch your favorite TV shows, watch a movie he or she wouldn't like, eat what you want, follow your own schedule, work on your hobbies...all the stuff you have very little time for during a normal week. He gave up all those things plus a lot of the basics like food and sleep so he could finish this bathroom for me.

Do you know what he said? He knew that I wanted a finished room in our house, and since he knew the basement bathroom couldn't be completed in 3 days, he decided to do this room so I would have one room that is completely done. How amazing is that? He totally put himself in my shoes and did what he thought would make me happy. Holy cow - I knew I married an awesome man, but this is so over the top and amazing. He works so hard at his job that he's often pretty beat when he gets home. For him to set aside so much time to complete this room for me is beyond what I could have dreamed. He finished it from top to bottom: ceiling tiles, baseboards and all the trim, fixtures, a new half wall to hide the plumbing, new electrical and plumbing, new laminate hardwood-look flooring (I absolutely love it), new wall color...there's probably even more I'm not thinking even thinking of right now. That makes ME tired! And thanks to my wonderful father-in-law, Vern, for pitching in on Saturday to get it all completed before I came home!

Thank you, baby. I feel like I won the lottery for the greatest, most loving and giving husband that can be found. You inspire me to keep thinking up new, fun surprises to show how much I love you.

I suppose I have to finish soon. I could write about this forever. Here is the very awesome wall sconce he picked out:

It is all even cooler in person, so please come over and see it soon!

And here is my wonderful baby at 3:57 a.m. on Saturday morning (it's hard to see the time in the picture):

I couldn't ask for a better husband. You were SO worth waiting for!

My Office, Part 2

2007-07-12T16:53:00.000-05:00

I took some pictures. I hope they turned out okay. This is my new office! I am so stressed today that I am not enjoying it very much, but it is a great office. And I like it very much. I just prefer to be putting on my workout clothes and walking out the stress in just a few minutes.

Change Can Be Good

2007-06-30T15:26:00.000-05:00

I tend to resist change. But I moved to a new office this week (same workplace, just a new office :-), and I am absolutely loving it. I loved cleaning out the desk and making room for more stuff. I loved rearranging furniture and decor. I loved buying a new picture frame into which will go a collage of pictures from our recent vacation. I am (gasp) excited to be in my office! Not that I don't like my job, but it's been a while since I actually can't wait to get to work.

I am going to enjoy this for as long as it lasts. And hopefully I'll get a picture taken soon so you can see it, too!

Oh, Sweet Bliss

2007-06-16T16:08:00.000-05:00

Vacation is long over, but it sure is fun to reminisce! So I'll do my best in summarizing the 12 days that we were gone. We'll see how far I get in this first post.

We flew into San Francisco and had quite an ordeal just getting to the car rental place, but we finally picked up our white Nissan Xterra. We really liked it, but we returned it on Tuesday in exchange for a little cheaper vehicle. It was definitely necessary for the off-roading we did, though! Anyway, we drove across the Bay Bridge and I got to take a bunch of pictures of the Port of Oakland for my husband. Only a few turned out, but there were a LOT of containers being loaded onto and off the ships. We hit the traffic jam of the year...it was crazy for a LLLOOONNNGGG way out of Oakland. We stopped in Tracy for some In-N-Out Burger. Have you been there? It's crazy good. By the time we got back on the road, the traffic had thinned out.

We stayed in Modesto on night one. We loaded up that night with road trip food and a cooler for our drinks. We planned on being in the mountains for a few days and didn't know what kind of food or how often we'd be able to find anything.

On Saturday, we drove to Jamestown to see Railtown 1897. Lots of movies ("Apple Dumpling Gang Rides Again," "Back to the Future III," etc.) and TV shows have used the park to tape their train scenes. We rode the train and then took a tour of the roundhouse. (This is us at Railtown.)

We also visited Matt's cabin from when they lived out there in Long Barn, CA. That was the beginning of our journey across Sonora Pass. We got some beautiful pictures (see the last post), but the driving was pretty insane. Nightfall came about halfway through the Pass, so we spent a lot of the drive in the dark, which is pretty crazy when you have no idea what the drop off right next to you is like. I am glad I was driving - I get more scared when riding then driving.

Anyway, after discovering I have acrophobia (unlike him), we made it to Judy's Tahoe cabin. We were SO tired, and we had quite an ordeal just getting a cheeseburger at McDonald's (I think they were closed but forgot to turn off the menu board, so they made the burgers for the starving travelers.) We had the alarm code and punched it in, but then we set it off trying to find our way around (it's quite a big place). We figured out she had switched the "arm" and "disarm" codes around in her note - possibly on purpose. She's quite the practical joker. We decided not to figure out the hot water heater until the morning, so I washed my face in the most freezing water I have ever used in my life. And we fell blissfully asleep.

This is already too long, so I will have to continue with day 3 and on at another time.

Vacation!

2007-06-10T22:05:00.000-05:00

I have been a blogging slacker, but I desperately want to write some things down about our vacation. At the very least, I'll post a few pictures and hopefully get some stuff written soon. Above is a location we found while driving across Sonora Pass (a.k.a. Insane, Crazy, Winding Highway to get across California). It was a beautiful drive while it was still light, and this area was gorgeous. We were finally able to watch some of our video last night. That was so much fun!!

This is from our dinner at Lou's Pier 47 Restaurant in San Francisco. It was a fun restaurant, very cute, and one of the pictures that we were able to get of both of us! Anyway, I will try to post more soon. Whatever "soon" means. It probably means "after VBS."

What Do I Do?

2007-04-23T17:36:00.000-05:00

This is a funny question. People ask, "You're a children's pastor? So, what do you do during the week?" I try not to be insulted. :-) But seriously, I kind of wonder, too: what do I do? It varies so immensely based on the season, the activities that are going on, etc. And if the senior pastor asks you to do something, then you do it regardless of whether or not it's on your "job description." So...I thought I would take a sample day of yesterday and see what I actually DO.

We are beginning to switch over to a new church management system. More than just a database, it will help us track volunteers, assign kids to classes/events, securely check them in and out, identify students by school/grade/birthdate, and a host of other items too detailed to list here. I am in charge of the implementation project with the awesome T as my sidekick (seriously - that's what they call it, a sidekick). We're very superhero-ish. Anyway, yesterday we had some problems entering data, so I worked on that. I also reviewed T's bunch of e-mails about a meeting we have scheduled this week to train data entry volunteers and attempted to line up child care for the meeting.

I entered into this same program a list of as many schools as I could find in the phone book if I knew that we have children who attend there. I also set security rights for all the staff who are the only users we have entered at this point.

I counted the offering from Sunday's kid's services.

I cleaned up some curriculum that was returned to me and took it to a closet upstairs.

I met with the leaders from our Sunday morning kid's church program. They have kicked off a new program in the past few weeks, and we talked about getting schedules put together for those volunteers. I helped them make one up in Excel and I will follow up with them next week to see if they were able to plug volunteers into all the spots as needed for the next 3 months.

I updated a quarterly schedule of youth volunteers for my pre-school classes. Each quarter, I get new curriculum for these classes. I have to update and copy new schedules, list the quarterly Bible verses, schedule youth volunteers, assimilate and distribute the materials (6 separate sets of teachers during those 3 months), and create a quarterly calendar for the entire children's ministry with a note to parents regarding that quarter's lesson themes and other activities or news. I am going on vacation at the end of May, so I need to finish all this work ahead of my regular schedule.

I made a few phone calls and sent e-mails to find substitutes for next month.

I have a meeting on Tuesday, so I printed off some materials to go over with a new teacher so I would be ready to meet with her.

I looked over the VBS volunteer list and considered who to ask for some of the empty positions still to be filled.

Last year's VBS materials were on a hard drive that crashed, so I have to create any documents used from scratch. I began yesterday with the creating schedule for the week.

I don't know if that sounds like a day's worth of work or not. I may have done a few other things in there, but that is the bulk of what I can remember. Anyway, it seems as though it's never a regular "to do" list but rather a constantly revolving door through which many events and people pass. There is no "typical day" in ministry. Not that I have ever experienced, anyway.

The Great Getaway

2007-04-11T16:53:00.000-05:00

We are beginning to plan our summer vacation! We have purchased our tickets and are going to spend 10 days in the San Jose/San Francisco area next month! I can't believe how quickly it is coming. Matt has a list a mile long of train and railroad-associated things to see and do. My list currently consists of malls and coffee shops to visit, but I hope to check out some of the tourism sites and find some other things that appeal to me. What I enjoyed so much about our honeymoon was the opportunity to just chill and relax - no pressure to go anywhere or do anything. Hopefully we can take at least a day to just do that. We are staying with some family friends of the Gidley's, and they have a separate guest home that will I'm sure be awesome! I've seen a few pictures - I'm not sure if they're still on Matt's website or not.

That is my exciting news - our first year of marriage was filled with so many fun trips and outings, and I'm looking forward to starting the second year off with a bang!

The more of this that happens on vacation, the better! Who wouldn't want to be doing this right about now? Bet it's not snowing there!

The First of Many

2007-04-02T17:00:00.000-05:00

What a year of firsts! The first year of marriage has been just wonderful, and we celebrated our first anniversary on Sunday. It was so special to spend time over the weekend reminiscing about our wedding and everything surrounding it. We have done so much in this first year - it's really been full of a lot of fun trips and memories. God has blessed us incredibly. He has kept us healthy and provided for all our needs and given us the ability to travel and enjoy our "DINK" status. I have learned so much about my husband and about myself this year. I am determined to be a better wife in the second year than I was in the first. I am so excited to see what God will bring our way as we grow closer to Him and to each other.

Thanks for an amazing first year, baby. You have shown me more love than I ever imagined I would experience in this year, and I believe God has blessed me with the most incredible husband - even more than I could have asked for. I know the best is yet to come for us!

Awesome God

2007-03-26T04:57:00.000-05:00

I don't know what else to say today. God is awesome. He did so many miracles this weekend in my life - every moment worked together and brought me to a place I have never been before with Him. I can't calm the excitement inside me. I feel like a different woman! I cannot fathom what He is going to do in my life that could be greater than this feeling, but I am reveling in every moment of it.

I'm also very glad that the super strong burning smell in my home this morning was not the house burning down. I forgot that when the weather gets warm, the Asian beetles get in the halogen lamp in our closet and they smell like the house is burning down. Thanks to my husband for driving all the way home to figure that out.

To my Grandpa

2007-02-21T16:29:00.000-06:00

To my Grandpa:

I was lucky to have two wonderful grandfathers in my life. I got you for the longest - 29 great years. I know that it was God's time to bring you home to be with Him, but I want you to know that I will miss you very much. I looked forward to holidays at your house so much. All the people, the laughter, the food, the fun, and your humor that made every occasion a blast. I think of all the times you and Grandma trekked down to southern Missouri and took me (and sometimes a friend) to dinner while I was in college. I remember all the graduations, musicals, drama team ministry, and so many other things in my growing-up years that you were a part of. But what I will remember most is your great hugs and your great smile and how they conveyed your great love for me. And I will be forever grateful to the man who invited you to church and to your willingness to hear and accept the salvation that Jesus offered. You began a Christian heritage that continues in your grandchildren and will continue for generations until Jesus comes. I couldn't be more grateful to follow in those footsteps that you laid out for us.

I love you so much, Grandpa. It was really hard to say good-bye this weekend. I want to hear one more joke, see one more smile, and get one more "I love you." As we were reminded this weekend - in God's time, it will only be a moment and then I will see you again.

Your Loving Granddaughter,

Angela

Wanna go to Cancun?

2007-01-18T17:25:00.000-06:00

Sorry. I can't send you there. But you can live vicariously through Matt's and my honeymoon pictures! Visit the picture galleries on Matt's website and our honeymoon pictures are the top link. (Even if you've seen them, his web design is so great that you have to at least check that part out!)

Maggie May

2007-01-11T16:41:00.000-06:00

Most of you who read my blog know my friend, Maggie May (her on the right, me in the middle, our friend Mandee on the left). I am thinking about her a lot this week because I just found out that she has breast cancer. She will have surgery on Wednesday followed by chemotherapy and radiation. I cannot fathom how this happens to a 26-year-old woman. I want to hug her and promise that everything will be okay. I really can't make that promise, but my God can. I believe with all my heart that He will heal her. He has great things to do in her life - she is AMAZING! She has so many gifts, and she has so much experience that I know God wants her to share. She is a true minister, one who loves others with all her heart and reaches out to them. I am blessed to be her friend, and now it's my job to be relentless in praying for her healing. I left my journal in the car, but I wrote about her today and was thinking of her in relation to this verse: "And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened." (Luke 11:9-10, New Living Translation) Keep on seeking. KEEP ON ASKING. KEEP ON KNOCKING. Our God is listening - I wonder if He just wants us to show how desperate we are for Him. I'm desperate for Maggie this week and for Him to heal her completely. He may use the course of her surgery and treatment to do so, He may not. I do not know His plan, but I will keep on asking and believe that He will heal her. Will you believe and pray with me?

I love you, Maggie. You are an amazing friend and I miss seeing your beautiful smile. Thanks for sharing your infectious laugh with me on Sunday and proving that God is still good and will be with you through it all.

Hooray for 2007!

2007-01-02T17:14:00.000-06:00

I like the thought of beginning a new year by closing out the last one. So I will participate in Heth's meme today.

What did you do in 2006 that you had never done before?
Got married (that should be enough right there)...lived in a church...changed my name...

Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't recall making any. I am making one this year...it's my secret, though. Well, two. The other is to be more consistent with my journaling.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
Lots of people I love did (or will soon)...Melanie is the closest person I can recall giving birth last year.

Did anyone close to you die?
No - my grandpa came close at Christmas, but he's doing better now.

What countries did you visit?
Mexico.

What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
More self-control. More trust in God.

What dates will remain etched in your memory and why?
April 1: wedding day. Celebrating our birthdays together for the first time.

What's your biggest achievement of the year?
Adjusting to marriage...still working on that. Getting into journaling and being more consistent and seeing my relationship with God grow.

What was your biggest failure?
Putting myself before others too many times.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
Illness - I was pretty sick in February. I ripped a nice chunk out of my arm when moving some stuff into our house...still have a scar from that one. That's about it from my recollection. Other unmentionable stuff.

What was the best thing you bought?
My birthday present to Matt. I'm very proud of that one.

Whose behavior merited celebration?
Matt and I have worked hard on setting a good foundation for our marriage. I am proud of us.

Whose behavior made you appalled and disgusted?
All front page celebrities.

Where did most of your money go?
Hard to say...it seems like bills. But we got to have fun, too, so I'm not complaining too much. We do eat out a lot, too.

What did you get really really excited about?
All the firsts of being married! Everything I get to do with my husband makes me excited...our wedding, our honeymoon, our Galena trip in July, our Chicago trip in December, our first Christmas together.

What song will always remind you of 2006?
"All I Ask of You" from "The Phantom of the Opera." Our wedding song.

Compared to this time last year are you?
a) happier or sadder? happier
b) fatter or thinner? Fatter, but it's a temporary situation.
c) richer or poorer? Richer

What do you wish you had done more of?
Letting go of my expectations.

What do you wish you had done less of?
Worrying.

How will you be spending New Year's Eve?
I was at home with my husband.

Did you fall in love in 2006?
Oh, yes.

What was your favorite TV program?
"King of Queens" and "Law & Order"

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
No.

What was the best book you read?
Such a tough one for me...so many great marriage books. Ask me if you want a list. :-) The biggest life-changer was the Bible. And Joy That Lasts by Gary Smalley was amazing.

What was your greatest musical discovery?
I still listen to a lot of United Live...probably a lot more rock since hanging out with my husband.

What did you want and get?
Someone to share life with.

What did you want and not get?
not sure...

What was your favorite film this year?
I really loved "Rocky Balboa." "World Trade Center" was awesome, too. Oh, hello - "Nacho Libre"!! Has to be top of my list with the new Rocky. "Did you tell them they were the Lord's cheeps?"

What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?
Drove to Des Moines...shopped...ate dinner with my parents...enjoyed spending it ALL with my fiancee(at the time)!

What one thing would have made your year measurably more satisfying?
The same thing as every year - worrying less and trusting God more. A constant struggle. And some other things I won't share.

How would you describe your personal fashion in 2006?
Cheap trendy and black?

What kept you sane?
God and Matt and Starbucks and shopping.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
There is no "fancying" - just morbid curiosity.

What political issue stirred you the most?
They all get me worked up...the whole Iraq war gets me up in arms...ha ha ha.

Who did you miss?
My family; Christy; the Rasmussens; Leann; Tricia. But I got to see most of them at my wedding!

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.
God works best when I am in the least amount of control. Wish I could learn that better.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime"

Christmas Lights

2006-12-17T17:30:00.000-06:00

If you have the time or the inclination to do so, you should drive by our home after 4:45 p.m. or so. We have some cool lights in the bell tower and even cooler lights inside (if we're home, we just might let you check it out). And they will likely be up past Christmas...we like to keep the holiday spirit alive as long as possible.

Merry Christmas!

Chicago, Day 2

2006-12-14T16:21:00.000-06:00

On to Saturday – we hunted down a Dunkin’ Donuts for some breakfast. Whoa – why don’t we have one of these here? It was awesome. Instead of getting on the train at Schaumburg, we scouted out the stop that was nearest to the train yard we had seen on Friday. We found it and had about half an hour to railfan (this is an insider’s term for chasing trains – I was informed that the in-insider’s term is “foaming” as in “foaming at the mouth.” The things you learn from marriage.) A lot of the yard was blocked by fences, but a break in the fence showed that the Canadian Pacific Holiday Train was still parked there! Its tour was to begin that day, so we pulled in and took some pretty good pictures of the cars and the engine. I could give you more train picture info, but suffice it to say that I enjoyed seeing my husband get excited about checking out the trains and taking pictures.

We took the train to Union Station again. This time, we bought tickets to the trolley tour and half an hour later, we boarded the trolley. We rode for a while checking out the sites and hearing some interesting stories from the driver/tour guide. We got off and took a cab to the Museum of Science and Industry. (The picture of us was taken there.) They have “The Great Train Story” exhibit, which features a very large, $3.5 million exhibit of an HO scale train from Seattle to Chicago. It was pretty sweet – Matt took tons of pictures. After a while, I walked down and ate some Cheetos and Diet Pepsi and called my Dad to kill a little time. They also had a real Burlington Zephyr train, and we happened upon a 20-minute tour. It was cool to hear about the maiden voyage of this high-speed passenger train.

By the time we left, it was dark and cold again, so we waited for the city bus to travel to North Michigan Avenue, a.k.a. The Magnificent Mile. We got off the bus and walked a little, but it was definitely dinner time and Matt had not had a snack, so he was really hungry. I knew he wanted some good deep dish pizza, so I looked online and found the #1 rated deep dish pizza, Gino’s East Pizzeria. I remembered the address, and we used our various maps to navigate a walking path. Good thing we were bundled up – it was definitely chilly. But we got to see a lot of windows and lights along the way. By the time we arrived, the line was definitely out the door. I had read that there is always a wait, so it was just a matter of how long. It was a mere 5-10 minutes before a man came out and announced that 110 people had just left the restaurant, so they needed 20 minutes to clear the tables and we could be seated. Then another woman came out looking for tables of 2, for which we qualified, so we were seated rather quickly. The server informed us that deep dish pizzas would take 45-50 minutes, so we ordered an appetizer and our pizza right away. It was…incredible. I cannot fully describe it with words. It must be personally experienced.

I was pretty tired when we finished at 8:00, and the trains were departing at 8:40 and 10:40, so we grabbed a cab and hoped for the 8:40. We made it in plenty of time, and we were able to drive around and check out Christmas lights before we headed to the hotel.

Vaca-shee-on!!

2006-12-13T13:50:00.000-06:00

(In defense of my title, I am a huge "King of Queens" fan, so the pronunciation is an homage to the humor of Kevin James.)

I know I’ve been gone a long time, but our vacation to Chicago was so great that I have to write about it!! We took a long weekend last Thursday-Sunday and spent it in the greater Chicago area. Matt and I have such a great time traveling together – I love making the hotel reservations, looking up the route, finding fun possibilities we can do in the area, etc., and Matt is the spontaneous one who finds things for us to do on the fly. So we drove over to Schaumburg late on Thursday night. We slept in on Friday, and then we headed to Woodfield Mall to get some warm gloves, etc. for my husband. Once we ate some lunch and were properly outfitted for the (freezing) cold weather, we then had to find the METRA station in Schaumburg. Asking for directions is pointless, so I scoured a gas station map until I was sure of how to get there (I didn’t want to buy it – it was $20!). We found the station, and we got on the train at 2:30 p.m. It was an hour-long ride, and we passed a HUGE train yard. Matt was salivating. We even saw the Canadian Pacific Holiday Train! It was very cool – Matt had read about it a little bit, but we had no idea it was going to be there.

Once we arrived at Union Station and headed outside, it was insanely freezing. We went about a block to the Sears Tower and decided to take the trip up to the Skydeck. It was an amazing view – it was around 4:00-5:00 p.m., and it was perfect lighting to get some incredible pictures. Matt has a few that maybe he’ll post someday. (Along with those wedding and honeymoon ones, right baby?) J It was a pretty frightening height, but it was worth the view. When we were done, it was really too cold to walk anywhere, which had originally been our plan. So we took a cab to Navy Pier. We put our names in at Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. and then walked around while we waited for a table. Navy Pier has a lot of fun shops – I had some cinnamon toasted cashews. Holy cow. I’ve had the almonds, but the cashews bring it to a whole new level.

After dinner, we took another cab back to Union Station and waited for the train. We had heard from the taxi driver that someone had shot a few people in a downtown office building, taken a hostage, and finally was shot by police. At the station, I was waiting for Matt in the restroom and a young man came up saying that he was stranded because of the shooting. (The METRA and other transportation had been shut down for about an hour because of it.) He needed to meet his girlfriend at a different place and had no money for the train. I am completely uncomfortable with being alone and having a strange man come up and speak to me. I kept looking at the bathroom hoping for Matt to come out. Finally he did, and I told him the story and asked him if we could walk over and buy the kid a train ticket. We did that and then got on the train. This train ride was quite an experience – a man was singing rather loudly to his crude hip-hop music for about half the ride. I was definitely looking forward to being done with that ride.

It was another late night, but our first day in Chicago was awesome. Read on for more Chicago fun!! (It’s too good, so it must be spread out in multiple posts.)

He's Got the Power

2006-11-06T17:15:00.000-06:00

I just shared this with a special friend, but in light of all that's happening in the evangelical world, it seemed to somewhat be applicable to all of us. Who of us can fix ourselves? It is solely the power of God and our trust in Him that changes our hard hearts. Our best efforts fall miserably short of His glory. That sounds depressing, but it's actually encouraging! I don't have to be good enough - I just have to trust that He is and that His power can change me, too.

S - Galatians 3:5-6 (MSG) "Answer this question: Does the God who lavishly provides you with his own presence, his Holy Spirit, working things in your lives you could never do for yourselves, does he do these things because of your strenuous moral striving OR because you trust him to do them in you?"

O - Paul's question answers itself when He describes God "working things in our lives we could never do for ourselves." We can't do them - obviously, it's only God who can.

A - Most days I can point out where I messed up in my thoughts or actions, and I often attribute the lack of self-control or the poor choices to my inability to "learn my lesson." But do I trust the God who began this work in me to complete it? If the weight of sin and the desire to overcome it rests squarely on my shoulders, I will lose the battle. I am human, and my personal choices will never be good enough to transform my own heart and mind. My only hope is for God to change me from the inside out - changing just what I do and say isn't enough. The very heart of who I am needs the touch of God. And if I am truly depending on God to change me, I will be desperate enough to spend time with Him, to read His words of life and allow them to sink deep into my soul, and to cry out with all my heart to my Father.

P - Father, I need You. The problem is that I can act like I don't need You, but the fact remains that I am a pitiful mess without You. Please forgive me for the actions that say I don't really need You in my life each day in order to make it. Despite my human nature, I want to be more like You in my heart of hearts. I trust that in my time spent with You, Your light will penetrate my heart and invoke the change I so desperately want to see.

Hello Fall!

2006-09-13T18:10:00.000-05:00

This has apparently become the land of the monthly posts. But Amie's return inspired me to blog today.

Fall is awesome. The chill in the air this weekend was so exciting - my thoughts immediately turn to the holidays. Consequently, I have more than once listened to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra in the past week. The fact that we just bought tickets for the Chicago show helps, too. We are very excited to see them again. It should be an awesome holiday weekend.

Life is moving on as usual. Work will begin again on our bathroom tomorrow night. I am so ready for that. It seems that as soon as Matt's commitment to the band was ended, we took the liberty of having our weekends back and filled almost every one until the end of October! I did not expect to be so busy this fall.

If anyone's still out there, I hope you are excited about the fall, too!! If not, come over - we'll make coffee (or hot chocolate if you prefer), grab the electric blanket, and cuddle on the couch with a great book. (I have SO many to read!! But more on that next time.)

Welcome Home!

2006-08-15T17:30:00.000-05:00

I spent last week at Junior Camp. I really didn't want to go - I did not want to leave my husband for 4 nights. But I did pretty well the first three days. I cried a little before bed each night; mostly because I missed him, and of course, having such a busy week I am sure that some of my emotion was due to simply being tired. He came on Wednesday evening to see me which I was looking forward to with much anticipation. However, I knew once I saw him that I was in trouble. It was going to be very difficult to say good-bye, and I was right. Thursday was a really hard day, but I made it and had some white cheddar popcorn that night that made things a little better. And finally, Friday came!! My thoughtful husband posted a "Welcome Home, Baby!" sign, made me a yummy brownie, and got me these. Awww!! It couldn't have been a better homecoming. Yeah for being home again!

Back from the Dead

2006-07-27T17:48:00.000-05:00

I know. It's been forever. Actually, most of you who read this have been on somewhat of a blogging sabbatical yourselves, so I don't feel terrible about it. Life just happens and you have to go with it. The sad thing is, many things have happened in the last month, some of which may be interesting and others not so much. At least not to you.

We did have a super fun July 4 holiday. We celebrated the anniversary of our first real date by re-visiting Galena, House on the Rock (well, Matt did anyway - I went to the mall in Madison), and Vinny Vanucchi's. Our server at dinner was the same guy who served us the night we were engaged! He remembered us; he even said that evening was "unforgettable." Awww!! We stayed at an awesome bed and breakfast. The Honeymoon Cottage was so sweet! We highly recommend it. On the 4th, we walked around town for quite a while and drove in to Dubuque as well. We were able to take a carriage ride, and the driver took the picture of us seen below. It was lots of fun! It's the first overnight trip we've done since the honeymoon. It was so fun to go as a married couple! Yeah!

Other than that, we are continually working on getting the house in order. I suppose it will be a lifelong journey at the rate we are going. The shower is awesome, though. Don't forget to look at the pictures on Matt's blog!!

Thursday Thirteen: Movies

2006-06-22T17:59:00.000-05:00

Thirteen Things about ANGELA

I figured this was an easy way to keep up since I have had little time to write. No water in our house...but the in-laws are gone, so at least we have a place to stay while it gets repaired. For now, I will do thirteen of my favorite movies. I have a very difficult time picking favorites, but these are top-ranked on my list.

1. Return to Me - One of my favorites of all-time. Just a nice romantic comedy. I'm a sucker for the romance, as I'm sure you will see. Great soundtrack, too.

2. Raising Helen - Again, a great romantic comedy. Kate Hudson is pretty funny, and the sisters were somewhat reminiscent of me and mine. I don't enjoy thinking about the people I love dying or anything, but it reminds you of how much they mean to you.

3. The Sound of Music - Come on. This is just a classic. I love the music and the gazebo seen with Liesl and...the guy. So great! I always wanted to be her!

4. You've Got Mail - I don't know what it is, but I could watch this movie repeatedly and never tire of it. It's so cute how he goes about befriending her in order to win her heart. I love it!

5. Diary of a Mad Black Woman - An all-around great movie with drama, romance, and absolutely hysterical to boot. Definitely worth checking out.

6. Pride & Prejudice - The new version with Keira Knightley. I just loved it; it's so witty and great all around.

7. Titanic - Haven't seen it in years, but it is the first movie that I remember really crying in the theater.

8. The Passion of the Christ - The most powerful movie I've ever seen. A pretty unbelievable experience in the theater when the church rented it out for a few showings.

9. Runaway Bride - Again, the romantic comedy just does it for me. Very fun movie, great soundtrack which includes Miles Davis, so it must be good.

10. The American President - The politics reeks, but the story is too cute. Another that I could watch over and over.

11. Napoleon Dynamite - How can this not be funny? Chatting online with babes? Numchuck skills? The dance!?!? It's a classic for our generation.

12. Center Stage - It's such a teeny-bopper sort of movie, but I can't help but love it. The dance at the end rules!

13. A Beautiful Mind - Great story, great acting.

I know I didn't include many serious movies or any action movies, which I really do like, but these are the ones that came to mind. Post your own list, too!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Thursday Thirteen

2006-06-15T11:43:00.000-05:00

Thirteen Things about ANGELA

I figured I'd give this a try - I guess you just pick a topic and write 13 things about yourself. So today's topic will be...13 places I have been.

1. Kansas City, MO. As kids, we visited Worlds of Fun and Oceans of Fun a few times for vacation. My Mom won tickets to the parks on a radio contest a couple of times.

2. Tijuana, Mexico. Pastor Jim took us on a missions trip here. I was 15, and it was the first time I flew on an airplane.

3. Branson, MO. I lived in Springfield for almost 7 years, and Branson is about 20-30 minutes south, so we shopped the outlets and watched IMAX movies during the college years and beyond.

4. Chicago, IL. I was on a traveling ministry team in college for all 4 years, so we visited many different places. My freshman year we went to Chicago for our Spring Break ministry trip. It was very eye-opening in many ways. We also walked down Michigan Ave. and ate great pizza.

5. Denver, CO. I went here with my family at a very early age; I have a few memories but not many. Pastor Jim also took us here for the national youth convention (I'm not sure what year it was, I want to say 1996 or 1997?). I remember feeling a distinct call to ministry at that time. I also visited for a work conference from the Assemblies of God youth department; interesting trip with my former roommate and co-worker (to say the least). Sing it with me, "I see your true colors shining through..."

6. Boca Raton, FL. Another Spring Break ministry trip in college. This was a beautiful area; very ritzy from what I recall. We walked on the beach, on a pier in Miami, and all the girls stayed together in one house (it wasn't too cramped or anything, though).

7. Orlando, FL. I had only been at my job in the youth department (Assemblies of God headquarters) for about two months when I was asked to go to the Fine Arts Festival and National Youth Convention in Orlando. I was so excited; my first big work trip, lots of overtime (= lots of moolah), a little bit of free time to shop, and experiencing my first General Council (it's a big deal for them...seriously). Very interesting trip; I loved carrying around a walkie-talkie and being all cool and stuff.

8. Detroit, MI. I drove up (a VERY long trip alone) for a very good friend's wedding. It was definitely fun. I think Shannon and I carpooled back together for yet another long car ride. But I really loved being in her wedding and sharing those moments with her.

9. Seattle, WA. I have visited Phil, Brenda, Kaitlyn, and Kramer three times in their city of residence. (To put a face with a name, Kaitlyn was junior bridesmaid at my wedding if you were there.) I love it there; they live RIGHT by the water in Kirkland, which is a very nice area. They have a boat, so we try to get out on the boat when I'm visiting, which is always so relaxing. Their home is beautiful and relaxing, and I love staying there. I hope I can visit them with Matt someday!

10. Washington, D.C./Dover, DE. This trip last summer with my parents and Tyler was so great. The ONLY thing I remember not liking was the fact that I wished I could enjoy it with Matt. We had just started hanging out, but I really wanted to share all those fun experiences with him. Going to my first race at Dover was so sweet.

11. Galena, IL. I love Galena! It will always be so special as the site of our first real date and as the place where Matt asked me to marry him. It's such an adorable little town.

12. New York, NY. Huge highlight trip for me; it had always been my dream trip. Originally I wanted to honeymoon there, but...yeah, I'm glad we didn't do that. We went in October and, well, here are a bunch of pictures if you didn't get to see them. Awesome trip with my baby (and Chris, can't forget that he came along :-).

13. Cancun, Mexico. Our honeymoon! Awesome resort that was very fun and relaxing. Pictures will be coming one of these days.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Nobody's a Nobody

2006-06-12T15:32:00.000-05:00

I wanted to blog today, but I am not sure what to write about. So I will default and post a journal entry.

Nobody's a Nobody

Scripture: Romans 9:25-26 (MSG) "I'll call the nobodies and make them somebodies; I'll call the unloved and make them beloved. In the place where they yelled out, 'You're nobody!' they're calling you 'God's living children.'"

Observation: The world's definition of us is inconsequential. Other people's view of us does not matter. What God calls us, the name He gives to us is the only one with which we should be concerned. The world will try to confuse us and Satan will use anything to distract us from hearing God's voice and what He is saying to us.

Application: I can so easily define who I am by the things another person says or does. I can be persuaded that God's love doesn't matter unless another person can see that same value in me. But God never asked me to look into the eyes of someone else to find my worth. Others may choose to affirm what God says about me, but that's all it is - an affirmation, not a definition. And if someone sees me as a nobody, then I am in the place for God to make His move and call me the somebody that He sees in me. So my lovability is based on His love for me. And He has said that when I feel unloved, He wants to step in and call me beloved. He wants to call me His very own, His child. The love that He created in me pales in comparison to the love that He offers me each day.

Prayer: Oh, Father, forgive me for forgetting that You are the only One who can meet all my needs and be all I could ever ask for. I know there's a time and a place for harsh reality and a time to step up to the plate and take responsibility for my life. But today could You just wrap Your arms around me and be my loving Father? What I desperately need is Your unconditional love that sees me as I am, every ugly part, and still grabs me and holds me tight and has faith in what I can become. It's hard work to live up to all You ask of me. But it's worth the work because I so desperately want to make You proud, want to be the apple of Your eye. Will You step in today and give me Your peace even if I don't deserve it? I can't fully express what it means to me that You love all of me and are not turned away when You see the ugliness of sin in my heart. You still embrace me as Your daughter and see the beauty of Your Son in me. Make me into the beautiful image of You. Make my heart more like You and strip away all that does not reflect You. Let me be a true picture of Your love to others.

Two for Togetherness

2006-06-01T09:05:00.000-05:00

I'm so excited to have been tagged for this! Thanks, Beefy!

2 things you compliment your husband on while in his presence.
1. His amazing computer skills (example shown below).
2. His cute legs.

2 compliments you make about your spouse to your friends.
1. His creativity that knows NO bounds.
2. He's a great writer and knows how to say incredibly sweet things in an eloquent manner.

2 traits you married him/her for.
1. His sincere desire to follow God.
2. His incredible gifts and the call of God that I know is on his life.

2 days you cherished the most with your husband being together.
1. The day of our engagement has to top this list. Since I've already written about it, I won't go into detail, but the entire day was full of anticipation for me, and I enjoyed each moment of being together and of the Christmas season.
2. Christmas Eve/Christmas Day 2005. Our first holiday together, being with our families, and being in church together. It was really special. (I would have written the wedding day, but it seems a little obvious; but I did cherish that day and the smart way we planned it so we could spend time together. Yeah for eating at Bourbon Street on our wedding night!)

2 material things you could give your husband if you just inherited a fortune.
1. A fiberglass body for a Batmobile (I could just pay someone to build it, but I know part of the joy for him will be building it himself).
2. This. And it would be a sacrifice for sure.

2 things you would miss the most if she/he left for two weeks.
1. Cuddling and talking and praying before bed.
2. His touch.

2 thoughts that crossed your mind when you first met/saw (or noticed in our case) your spouse.
1. I am sure we would have a great time together; he is so funny!
2. What could I do to get him to notice me?

2 favorite dates
1. So many of the first dates were so much fun, but if I have to pick two...definitely July 4 of last year. He had invited me about a week or two earlier to visit the House on the Rock for the holiday. He surprised me that morning with a single red rose on my car seat (the first romantic gesture he had made, and I was floored; I remember shaking as I tried to put in my earrings while we were driving away in the car). We visited, I got sick, I bought some medicine and napped in the car, he drove us to Galena, we walked around looking at houses and walking down Main Street, we ate at Vinny Vanucchi's, and we watched fireworks together from the top of the hill. And he hugged me for the first time that day. It was the most amazing day. My journal entry about it is pretty good. He wrote a little about it, too, in his proposal narrative.
2. It's so hard to pick! Since I already said New York is a favorite vacation, I'm going to pick a different date (even though the Queen concert day was awesome). How about my birthday? No, I'm going with our trip to Minneapolis. We went to "The Christmas Carol" at the Guthrie Theater. Then we hung out at the Mall of America in our dress up clothes. It was very fun. I just love road-tripping with my husband; most of them are pretty memorable in my mind. And I love doing different things, and the play and the Mall and dressing were so fun and different from the norm.

2 funny odd things you love.
1. His constant preoccupation with Batmobiles (and this website). Since it's my blog, I'll take a second to show you what he has done since he doesn't have a Batmobile to work on yet - desktops for all the guys who are in the process of building theirs! (Thank goodness we don't have a computer set up at home. The bathroom would have a projected finish date of April 2012. )
2. The way he snaps his fingers near his ears to see if they are cleared up (he has lots of problems with his ears being clogged up and can never hear just right, poor thing).

2 places you have lived with your spouse.
1. Our current church/home
2. My old apartment (for exactly one week).

2 favorite vacations
1. New York City, baby!
2. Our honeymoon near Cancun (we will get pictures up for you to see, I promise!).

2 people I tag
1. Could I possibly get Rev60 to do this? (I'm sure I'm not allowed to tag my own husband, so I'll see if someone else's will do it.)
2. How about T - I'd love to hear her comments!

The Lost Has Been Found!

2006-05-31T10:49:00.000-05:00

I found the missing box! It was with kitchen stuff. A bathroom box in the basement hiding under my knife set and napkin holder. Isn't that how it always works? Anyway, these are the eyeshadows that were in said box and missing me dreadfully over the past month and a half. (This does not include the 3 or 4 sets in my makeup bag.) Yes, it's a lot. Yes, it's every color of the rainbow. But in my defense, I had a plethora of $3 coupons, so I waited for the makeup to go 50% off at either K-Mart or Osco and bought most of them for less than $1. So I was able to use my long-lost colors this morning and enjoyed it immensely. I also got a straw from Kwik-Star that did not have slits in both ends (they seem to have the worst quality straws that are split at both ends, pinching your tongue if you're not careful while drinking). Hopefully these are signs that this will be a good day. I'm counting on it.